Just a thought @D0rdogne_Damsel but another time, does Charlie have a friend who he could invite to stay at his fatherās with him sometimes? Ā I have found that some fathers behave much better if thereās an unrelated third male around ā¦ Ā āin publicā so to speak ā¦ it might help š¤Ā
Gardening in Central NorfolkĀ on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Hi all, just had a read back to see how you all are. All quiet here, daughter and son in law have set off back to Oxford after an early lunch. They waited for the worst of the storm to pass through here, hopefully theyāll have a smoother journey as they head north. Iām finishing a bottle of white wine, with my feet up. Sense of satisfaction that all the food went down well, even the kids ate like troopers. Thanks to all who gave advice or posted food suggestions and recipes on this thread. Iāve been taking it all in over the year and have learned a lot! Much appreciated! Lots of games were played, and lots of laughter.
@punkdoc, any distractions to occupy your mind and give you less time to worry today? Hopefully this time tomorrow, your second hip will be done, and you can start planning your gardening in the spring. Weāll all be waiting for your update.
@D0rdogne_Damsel, well done, for giving Charlie a relatively trouble free Christmas, you really deserve a happier New Year, so indulge in any rest you can grab for yourself.
Forecast for sun tomorrow morning, the rain has stopped here now, and the wind has dropped. Your daughter should be driving into better weather as she gets further south, @Lizzie27.Ā Iāll reload the dishwasher tonight, but the laundry will have to wait.Ā Take care all.Ā
Nice idea @Dovefromabove, and I'm sure with 'normal' males that might work well. Unfortunately, Charlie has had too many bad experiences of his father embarrassing him in front of his friends and has said he will never invite friends there again. I'm not talking about amusing ' dad dancing 'Ā or anything like that, but seriously humiliating Charlie, losing his temper, swearing, criticising and lecturing them all. When I was there I was able to intervene and lighten the mood, but for Charlie it's an absolute no no now.Ā
He is the most difficult person you can imagine, a serious personality disorder I'm sure, highly intelligent, high functioning and extremely manipulative, it's taken me years to escape him, so often I've been persuaded it's me at fault not him. Others that know him, and I've a close friend who used to be a social worker, all say what a difficult person he is to comprehend, such a complex personality and the worst thing is he has absolutely no idea how to behave in social situations, absolutely no idea of what is appropriate behaviour at all.Ā
How Charlie has turned out normal I've no idea, although I know I've spent years and years protecting him. I'm just so grateful that he is a happy confident young man, and so popular with everyone he meets. And he's so kind too, despite suffering from his dad's behaviour, he always makes allowances for him and tries to please him. How does life get so complex?Ā
Here's to a fresh start this year, think there's more than a few of us on here that need it. šš
āCoffee. Garden. Coffee. Does a good morning need anything else?ā āBetsy CaƱas Garmon
The visiting family have left and I have stripped the beds and covered them over for next time. Ā The washing machine is programmed to go on during the night with the first load. Ā It looks as if I will be having leftovers for a few days - aubergine parmigiana, cockerel, roasties and gravy. Ā A bit of colcannon with a salad tonight. A few slices of smoked salmon to finish and quite a bit of foie gras.
I expect everything will go well for you tomorrow @punkdoc - we are in your pocket and thinking of you pre-op.
As with @floralies we have had some lovely weather. Ā The wind abated and it was pleasant walking the dogs. Ā I didn't go to the beach to walk them - I don't think trudging through sand could be good for the hip and knee.
Scrumptious menu @Dovefromabove - I'm glad you were able to relax and enjoy the meal - the year has been a difficult one for you and also for you OH.
Ā Hang in there @D0rdogne_Damsel Ā Maybe one day he'll find a girlfriend and leave you and Charlie alone. Ā Hopefully in some remote country!!
Ā To finish here is an expression pertaining to this festive time of year: Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā If you think you are enlightened, spend a week with family.
Gosh, it all sounds a nightmare @D0rdogne_Damsel. I expect the reason why Charlie has turned out the way he has is because he takes after you.
It's been a lovely sunny day. I've pruned the 10 roses along the orchard fence and planted 2 roses by the gazebo. That took a bit of time as the ground was full of clay and big stones. It's all mixed up with compost. The roses I planted are Strawberry Hill and climbing Iceberg. I have 2 more to plant on the gazebo, Open Arms and Chevy Chase.
Dordogne and Norfolk. Clay in Dordogne, sandy in Norfolk.
Absolutely understood @D0rdogne_Damsel ā¦ itās a strategy that either works or it doesnāt with folk like that ā¦ however neither you nor Charlie have any duty to put yourselves in physical or emotional harmās way ā¦ as long as Charlie understands that he absolutely does not have to be there ātrying to please himā if he feels uncomfortable in any way. Children owe their parents nothing at all. Ā š¤Ā
Gardening in Central NorfolkĀ on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Your ex sounds an absolute nightmare @Dordogne_Damsel, I'm so sorry you have to suffer like that. Console yourself with the fact that once Charlie is 18Ā you need never see or speak to your ex again.
Daughter is home safely although had to divert through Wells because of a fallen tree.Said the east boumd M4 was choccca so hope your daughter made it back to Oxford OK.Ā
On a happier note, my Turkey Tartlets turned out well and OH said he liked them. I'm going to freeze the 6 left over, would make good 'starters'. The mixture made more than the recipe indicated though.Ā
Those tartlets look delicious! Daughter safely back to Oxford, via M5 towards Gloucester and then cross country via Burford. Took under three hours here on Christmas Eve, took four and a half hours back this afternoon, most of that on the M5 towards Bristol, took over two and a half hours to reach the Cribbs Causeway area, nearly twice the usual journey time. Still, they got back ok and have a couple of days off to recover. Iām absolutely shattered after all the excitement, so headed off to bed with a Baileys, a book and my iPad! Just on a whim, I checked on line when the next recycling date is. Tomorrow! We pulled on some clothes and dragged ourselves out in the dark. Luckily it had stopped raining, and we got the bins down to the bottom of the drive. Phew! Back to bed, listening to the wind howling outside.Ā Hope you are managing to feel a bit calmer, @punkdoc? Have you got a good book to distract you if you wake in the night? Donāt worry if you canāt sleep, youāll be able to catch up after your op.Ā
Posts
Gardening in Central NorfolkĀ on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
All quiet here, daughter and son in law have set off back to Oxford after an early lunch. They waited for the worst of the storm to pass through here, hopefully theyāll have a smoother journey as they head north.
Iām finishing a bottle of white wine, with my feet up. Sense of satisfaction that all the food went down well, even the kids ate like troopers. Thanks to all who gave advice or posted food suggestions and recipes on this thread. Iāve been taking it all in over the year and have learned a lot! Much appreciated!
Lots of games were played, and lots of laughter.
@punkdoc, any distractions to occupy your mind and give you less time to worry today? Hopefully this time tomorrow, your second hip will be done, and you can start planning your gardening in the spring. Weāll all be waiting for your update.
@D0rdogne_Damsel, well done, for giving Charlie a relatively trouble free Christmas, you really deserve a happier New Year, so indulge in any rest you can grab for yourself.
Forecast for sun tomorrow morning, the rain has stopped here now, and the wind has dropped. Your daughter should be driving into better weather as she gets further south, @Lizzie27.Ā
Iāll reload the dishwasher tonight, but the laundry will have to wait.Ā
Take care all.Ā
He is the most difficult person you can imagine, a serious personality disorder I'm sure, highly intelligent, high functioning and extremely manipulative, it's taken me years to escape him, so often I've been persuaded it's me at fault not him. Others that know him, and I've a close friend who used to be a social worker, all say what a difficult person he is to comprehend, such a complex personality and the worst thing is he has absolutely no idea how to behave in social situations, absolutely no idea of what is appropriate behaviour at all.Ā
How Charlie has turned out normal I've no idea, although I know I've spent years and years protecting him. I'm just so grateful that he is a happy confident young man, and so popular with everyone he meets. And he's so kind too, despite suffering from his dad's behaviour, he always makes allowances for him and tries to please him. How does life get so complex?Ā
Here's to a fresh start this year, think there's more than a few of us on here that need it. šš
The visiting family have left and I have stripped the beds and covered them over for next time. Ā The washing machine is programmed to go on during the night with the first load. Ā It looks as if I will be having leftovers for a few days - aubergine parmigiana, cockerel, roasties and gravy. Ā A bit of colcannon with a salad tonight. A few slices of smoked salmon to finish and quite a bit of foie gras.
I expect everything will go well for you tomorrow @punkdoc - we are in your pocket and thinking of you pre-op.
As with @floralies we have had some lovely weather. Ā The wind abated and it was pleasant walking the dogs. Ā I didn't go to the beach to walk them - I don't think trudging through sand could be good for the hip and knee.
Scrumptious menu @Dovefromabove - I'm glad you were able to relax and enjoy the meal - the year has been a difficult one for you and also for you OH.
Ā Hang in there @D0rdogne_Damsel Ā Maybe one day he'll find a girlfriend and leave you and Charlie alone. Ā Hopefully in some remote country!!
Ā To finish here is an expression pertaining to this festive time of year: Ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā If you think you are enlightened, spend a week with family.
Ā
It's been a lovely sunny day. I've pruned the 10 roses along the orchard fence and planted 2 roses by the gazebo. That took a bit of time as the ground was full of clay and big stones. It's all mixed up with compost. The roses I planted are Strawberry Hill and climbing Iceberg. I have 2 more to plant on the gazebo, Open Arms and Chevy Chase.
Gardening in Central NorfolkĀ on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Daughter is home safely although had to divert through Wells because of a fallen tree.Said the east boumd M4 was choccca so hope your daughter made it back to Oxford OK.Ā
On a happier note, my Turkey Tartlets turned out well and OH said he liked them. I'm going to freeze the 6 left over, would make good 'starters'. The mixture made more than the recipe indicated though.Ā
Turkey tartlets look delicious, I may well be making those for a NYE buffet.Ā
Iām absolutely shattered after all the excitement, so headed off to bed with a Baileys, a book and my iPad! Just on a whim, I checked on line when the next recycling date is. Tomorrow! We pulled on some clothes and dragged ourselves out in the dark. Luckily it had stopped raining, and we got the bins down to the bottom of the drive. Phew! Back to bed, listening to the wind howling outside.Ā
Hope you are managing to feel a bit calmer, @punkdoc? Have you got a good book to distract you if you wake in the night? Donāt worry if you canāt sleep, youāll be able to catch up after your op.Ā