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GardenIng jokes

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  • Jeanie i have copy write on all my jokes,but i will let you off just this once as long as it makes people smile.

  • A guy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, and then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"

    The doctor replied, "It's very simple. You're two tents."

    • Why did the baker rob the bank?
    • He needed the dough.
  • Have you ever smelled moth balls?
    ...
    Yes.
    ...
    How did you manage to get his little legs open?

  • My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers.
    To be honest, I should have seen the signs.

  • A man walks into the doctor's office with a piece of lettuce hanging out of his bum.
    The doc takes one look and he says, "Jeeze, it looks like we have one hell of a problem here." The guy responds "this is just the tip of the iceberg."

  • XX Posts: 707

    Me and daughter in stitches - easily pleased, well done Dave

  • A man opens his door and finds a snail on his front porch. 
    He picks it up and throws it across the street.
    A year later the man opens his door and finds the same snail on his front porch.
    The snail looks up and says, "What the f..k was *that* all about?"

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