A friend of mine spent a fortune for a new landscaped garden, within a week there were molehills like mountains all over his new lawn. Confiding in a friend at the pub how hacked of he was at this problem the friend suggested he contact the local molecatcher, so he did. That saturday the molecatcher arrived and want into his garden, 30 minutes later said molecatcher knocks on his front door and says job done. My friend is so releived he pays the man double, just as the molecatcher is leaving my friend says "that mole has cost me a fortune, if i bung you a few more quid can you dispose of it the worst way you can thing of" sure can says the molecatcher, in the pub that night my friend runs into the molecatcher and enquires, i am curious to know how you disposed of that pesky mole. Oh that was easy says the molecatcher, i took him round the back and burried him alive.
A little boy goes up to Old Ned the gardener and says, ‘What do you put on your rhubarb?’ ‘Well, usually rotted horse manure,’ replies Old Ned. ‘We have custard.’ says the little boy.
The manager of a garden centre overhears one of his nurseryman talking to a customer. ‘No, we haven’t had any of that in ages,’ says the nurseryman. ‘And I don’t know when we’ll be getting any more.’ The customer leaves and the manager walks over to give him a telling off. ‘Never tell a customer we can’t get them something,’ he says. ‘Whatever they want we can always get it on order and deliver it. D’you understand?’ The nurseryman nods. ‘So what did he want?’ asks the manager. ‘Rain,’ replies the nurseryman.
The Man U store is now selling an improved version of its Man U themed computer mouse. The scroll wheel has been speeded up to help you find their position in the table much faster.
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Verdun, tut tut!
Hi,
A friend of mine spent a fortune for a new landscaped garden, within a week there were molehills like mountains all over his new lawn. Confiding in a friend at the pub how hacked of he was at this problem the friend suggested he contact the local molecatcher, so he did. That saturday the molecatcher arrived and want into his garden, 30 minutes later said molecatcher knocks on his front door and says job done. My friend is so releived he pays the man double, just as the molecatcher is leaving my friend says "that mole has cost me a fortune, if i bung you a few more quid can you dispose of it the worst way you can thing of" sure can says the molecatcher, in the pub that night my friend runs into the molecatcher and enquires, i am curious to know how you disposed of that pesky mole. Oh that was easy says the molecatcher, i took him round the back and burried him alive.
Pause for thought, if corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from.
no 2, If a man is in the garden and speaks, and their is no woman to hear him, is he still wrong.
No 3, The philosopher who said, work well done never needs doing over, never weeded a garden.
O K sorry.
A small boy is helping his grandfather dig up potatoes. ‘What I want to know,’ he says, ‘is why you buried the damn things in the first place.’
A little boy goes up to Old Ned the gardener and says, ‘What do you put on your rhubarb?’ ‘Well, usually rotted horse manure,’ replies Old Ned. ‘We have custard.’ says the little boy.
The manager of a garden centre overhears one of his nurseryman talking to a customer. ‘No, we haven’t had any of that in ages,’ says the nurseryman. ‘And I don’t know when we’ll be getting any more.’ The customer leaves and the manager walks over to give him a telling off. ‘Never tell a customer we can’t get them something,’ he says. ‘Whatever they want we can always get it on order and deliver it. D’you understand?’ The nurseryman nods. ‘So what did he want?’ asks the manager. ‘Rain,’ replies the nurseryman.
9 out of 10 husbands agree that their wives are always right.
The 10th husband hasn't been seen since the survey was conducted
The Man U store is now selling an improved version of its Man U themed computer mouse. The scroll wheel has been speeded up to help you find their position in the table much faster.