It will get easier @star gaze lily- both the other forum, and life. Just keep getting up each day and suiting yourself as to what you do. Write down your feelings too. Then destroy it if you want, but it's a good way of dealing with the trauma. Re @Dovefromabove's post about the kindness of strangers, yes - I've had that too, from the people on this forum when I joined, having 'escaped' someone, but also in real life when my husband walked out. I had two little girls whose life had been turned upside down - the younger one had just started school and was struggling with that anyway, and the older one was eight, and very much a daddy's girl. She just broke down one day on the way to school. A girl I'd met through toddler's and Playgroup, whose girls were the same ages, saw me at the checkout in the s'market one day, and saw I wasn't myself, and asked how I was. I'll spare you the detail of what then happened. I wasn't particularly friendly with her, but she sent me flowers. I've never forgotten that kindness. or the man at the taxi firm when I phoned ,sobbing and distraught, and begged him not to let the abusive partner I'd got away from, get a taxi to the house I was renting, because he was still stalking and threatening me. He'd already done it once before. The taxi firm man was true to his word.
It's a place where beautiful isn't enough of a word....
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
Star Gaze Lilly, also sending you love and condolences 💕. I'll have a bash at the other thread, but you all know I'm techno rubbish. I haven't been on the forum for a while. I have wondered how folks are. Multiple health issues,long COVID and a puppy!I had a lesion removed from my chest,it was incredibly painful,then my 14 years old granddaughter had a nasty fall,bad break of her clavicle. You know how it is! Hoping to see you all "on the other side"
It restores your faith @Fairygirl. For every worthless g*t, thee are several kind people. I'm glad you have managed to rebuild your life. It takes strength and courage, and you have that in spades. (Gardening pun intended).
Extremely cruel of GW to choose to do this and get away with it, I'd never realised one has no rights upon making an account —not even edit or delete, let alone hope for consistent or guarantee of some rights over one's input and durability of connection/information.
I personally am not keen on the GW programme or magazine /culture whatsoever, and this forum is the only interesting and truly informative aspect of the GW enterprise, and which I have always been aware was only incidental to the brand.
Hope people find their community footing elsewhere, I'd also recommend www.reddit.com/r/gardeningUK should this be useful to others. It's less of a community as provincial sociality and more like 'someone else on the island looking at the life of their garden wondering how to better support it'
I've joined Gardeners Corner. Had to do it on my phone, bit small, especially doing the "I'm not a Robot" bit. I hope @Allotment Boy managed that in the end. I couldn't keep my name, I've joined as "EtoileViolette".
It came at a bad time when we were driving from Norfolk to Dordogne.
I was glad to see that there were a lot of old friends from GW already there and it was lovely to be welcomed there. I've been posting here for 12 years, it felt like a big empty hole opening in front of me. Though I do post on a small private forum of ex GW members.
A lot of people like @WonkyWomble, @Fairygirl and @star gaze lily have said some things here that made me feel quite emotional but this thread had gone so fast and I was driving throug France yesterday so I haven't been able to respond. I hope I will see you again on GC.
Dordogne and Norfolk. Clay in Dordogne, sandy in Norfolk.
@Busy-Lizzie I think you can put your GW name in your signature on GC. However, it looks like editing your signature may need to be done on a windows device. Someone please correct me if that’s wrong. I have not been able to find my signature on my iPad, but others have done it.
Carmarthenshire (mild, wet, windy). Loam over shale, very slightly sloping, so free draining. Mildly acidic or neutral.
Thank you @AnniD. There are things which still come back to bite me - being called for jury duty last year [twice] caused a meltdown, because of past experience, but I've got through the other side of that. When I got very depressed about my knee problems, and I'd got back out walking with some big hefty knee braces, I stuck two fingers up at him on the summit of the first new hill I did. I've done that frequently since then. Eventually, when I thought of him, I just thought - I couldn't give a shit, and I'm not going to think about you again. That's when you know you're over them, because you don't even hate them any more - you have no feelings for them at all. I'm lucky. I got away. So many don't.
I hasten to add - this isn't my ex hubby, who I have a very good relationship with.
It's a place where beautiful isn't enough of a word....
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
Posts
Re @Dovefromabove's post about the kindness of strangers, yes - I've had that too, from the people on this forum when I joined, having 'escaped' someone, but also in real life when my husband walked out. I had two little girls whose life had been turned upside down - the younger one had just started school and was struggling with that anyway, and the older one was eight, and very much a daddy's girl. She just broke down one day on the way to school. A girl I'd met through toddler's and Playgroup, whose girls were the same ages, saw me at the checkout in the s'market one day, and saw I wasn't myself, and asked how I was. I'll spare you the detail of what then happened. I wasn't particularly friendly with her, but she sent me flowers.
I've never forgotten that kindness. or the man at the taxi firm when I phoned ,sobbing and distraught, and begged him not to let the abusive partner I'd got away from, get a taxi to the house I was renting, because he was still stalking and threatening me. He'd already done it once before. The taxi firm man was true to his word.
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
I'm glad you have managed to rebuild your life. It takes strength and courage, and you have that in spades. (Gardening pun intended).
I personally am not keen on the GW programme or magazine /culture whatsoever, and this forum is the only interesting and truly informative aspect of the GW enterprise, and which I have always been aware was only incidental to the brand.
Hope people find their community footing elsewhere, I'd also recommend www.reddit.com/r/gardeningUK should this be useful to others. It's less of a community as provincial sociality and more like 'someone else on the island looking at the life of their garden wondering how to better support it'
It came at a bad time when we were driving from Norfolk to Dordogne.
I was glad to see that there were a lot of old friends from GW already there and it was lovely to be welcomed there. I've been posting here for 12 years, it felt like a big empty hole opening in front of me. Though I do post on a small private forum of ex GW members.
A lot of people like @WonkyWomble, @Fairygirl and @star gaze lily have said some things here that made me feel quite emotional but this thread had gone so fast and I was driving throug France yesterday so I haven't been able to respond. I hope I will see you again on GC.
When I got very depressed about my knee problems, and I'd got back out walking with some big hefty knee braces, I stuck two fingers up at him on the summit of the first new hill I did. I've done that frequently since then. Eventually, when I thought of him, I just thought - I couldn't give a shit, and I'm not going to think about you again.
That's when you know you're over them, because you don't even hate them any more - you have no feelings for them at all.
I'm lucky. I got away. So many don't.
I hasten to add - this isn't my ex hubby, who I have a very good relationship with.
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...