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Hello Forkers ... July Edition

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  • DovefromaboveDovefromabove Posts: 88,147
    Nanny Beach says:

    .............Thinking of going out plant hunting!!


    I'd come with you if I wasn't watching the tennis ........  watch out for those sticky plant labels ... you may come back with enough plants for all of us image

    It's tough being 'the sounding board' isn't it ... especially when it makes you feel that there should be something you could be doing to put things right ... is there someone else you OH could talk to as well ... therapist/counsellor type person?


    Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.





  • Busy-LizzieBusy-Lizzie Posts: 24,043

    imageThis is the vase of flowers I took to my friend's Memorial Service. There were flowers from people's gardens all around and on the altar. We were invited to share memories. I told them about her herb garden, which was lovely and she was proud of it. She had some unusual plants.

    Dordogne and Norfolk. Clay in Dordogne, sandy in Norfolk.
  • AuntyRachAuntyRach Posts: 5,291

    The flowers are beautiful, Busy. They must have been collected with a heavy heart, but they are full of love - very touching. 

    Sunny spells here so will venture outside again after tennis... hoping for three sets...

    Last edited: 13 July 2017 15:11:54

    My garden and I live in South Wales. 
  • Nanny BeachNanny Beach Posts: 8,719

    He s a bloke from Sarf London Dove! He had years of various antidepressants, and diazepam, years ago finnally saw a phsyco/hypno therapist, having said it was all a load of *******, people kept telling me he ought to do this and that, but he had to do it, not me, that was for agoraphobia, he also has sociaphobia, and xenophobia, which people seem to thin is fear of anyone foerign but is actually fear of strangers, he s had it for years, (Mum walked out when he was 7 went offf with another man) no councelling in the 60s for kids.Sometimes hes worse than others, we did get to Hampton Court this year, there is no buying tickets in advance.Tried to get him to do CBT or NLP een tried to get an appointment with Paul Mckenna, but he only does seminars these days 200/300 people, no way would he go to that.  Wonder if he might even be on the autistic spectrum, he cant bear change disruption from the normal ruitine.  What stuck to me, a pink lavender, very pretty deep pink Gaura, miltonia orchid, deep pink/white flower, and a calathea orange flowers, couldnt get them unstuck!!!

  • Nanny BeachNanny Beach Posts: 8,719

    They know what hes like at work, hes worked with most of them for years, mind you when he got talking to them, its surprising, some of the guys in their 30s who seem not to have a care in the world, a huge percentage of them are on antidepressants.

  • Nanny BeachNanny Beach Posts: 8,719

    They are lovelly BL.

  • DovefromaboveDovefromabove Posts: 88,147

    I understand NannyB ... anxiety and  huge need to feel in control ... because when he wasn't in control something truly terrible happened  image... it's a type of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.  


    Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.





  • Nanny BeachNanny Beach Posts: 8,719

    Thats exactly it, I think the reason he doesnt want to go away from home (ie. Holiday) is because he went to school one day age 7, came home to find his Mother, had waited till the kids were at school and left, his sister was 8, brother 6.He would probably poo poo the idead, (being a sarf London bloke, I did a bit of physcology/phsysciatry (which I cannot spell) when nursing, I have to boost him up, unfortunately his Dad said to the kids your Mother has left she doesnt love you anymore. BUT she never shown any love, anyway, he said she never kissed or cuddled them.  She is a nasty controlling bully, we dont have anything to do with her, havent spoken for 8 years.  She treated her second hubby (the one she went off with) like dirt, only years after his very early death did she say to me she didnt apreciate him, I knew that. I havent planted plant yet, not got myself into the gardening frame of mind.  I know you watch Love your Garden, and feel truely humbled.  Our lovelly consultant who died last year, he was amazing, I was choked up talking to him.  I dunno, maybe 40 years of listening to everyones problems, I am burnt out!  My youngest has broblems no fault of her own, and of course she needs to speak to me, was making a joke this morning.  She is Hubbies, the oldest 3 are from first marriage, and (second) b=hubby cannot understand why the kids come to me thwne they have a problem although the oldest is 46, because he never ever had that raport with his Mother.  She IS called MOTHER mine was MUM!

  • Nanny BeachNanny Beach Posts: 8,719

    See you get free therapy sessions on this forum.  Ironically, I was always good at listening to other peoples problems, I was the "go to" for advice.

  • DovefromaboveDovefromabove Posts: 88,147

    Maybe if he could see that it's PTSD ... just like the soldiers get ... he might feel more able to accept help?


    Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.





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