They don't have to be large affairs or just social - 4 can meet to play whist or bridge. It only takes 2 to go for a walk but with a walking group you get to see new places and chat to different people along the way. Great way to meet new people and find new places. People can meet to draw/paint/sew/knit/sculpt/woodwork together. Age UK are running a project called Men in Sheds to get isolated men out of the house and talking and realising they are not alone in their isolation.
I'm not big on large groups of strange people either but if you try a common interest you make new friends with whom to share experiences and goodies. We aren't going to meet new friends at work, school or church but dancing, golf and patchwork get us out and about as does the gardening group. Come spring, we'll see what the local over 60s club has to offer and what we can offer in return. Still trying to find a local U3A.
Vendée - 20kms from Atlantic coast.
"The price good men (and women) pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men (and women)."
Obelixx, you are fortunate in being a strong and resourceful person, but not everyone sees things like you.
For many people, particularly men, it can be very hard to make the leap, from knowing you are lonely, to actually being able to do something about it.
This can easily become a downward spiral, the longer you are lonely, the lower your self esteem, and the less likely you are to try and solve the problem.
How can you lie there and think of England When you don't even know who's in the team
My Mum loved the U3A . Dad did short mat bowls and ballroom dancing. Both hated the school summer holidays when all the clubs and things would stop for 2 months.
A friend's mother said it was the long winter evenings - especially Sundays - she hated. She wasn't confident going out alone after dark. The days were OK, weekdays no problem, and in summer the evenings are short. But in Winter, once she'd come in from church on a Sunday afternoon, she'd shut the front door and then that was it - on her own until Monday morning .
Gardening on the edge of Exmoor, in Devon
“It's still magic even if you know how it's done.”
I think that some people naturally enjoy and crave the company of others, and some do not. Bereavement, ill health or anxiety can make those who may benefit from socialising avoid it in the first place.
On a lighter note - I have been mesmerised by a small flock of Fieldfares in my garden today! I first thought they were Mistle Thrush but my little binoculars helped me see their detail for an I.D.
It's self defence Liri. Surely as we age we expect to be left behind by bereavement and should plan ahead for coping mechanisms. I have a friend in her early 60s who lost her partner about 18 months ago. They had a dog so she was obliged to take him out for a walk each day and thus have a few minutes chat with other doggy owners but hadn't realised how lonely and isolated she was until she recently joined the local U3A group. Now she has activities and new friends and a whole new spark of life.
In France and Belgium the local councils actively promote clubs from sport or art for kids to art and reading, crafts, dramatics, walking, excursions etc for adults and OAPs alike and provide free or cheap access to community halls and rooms. They know who lives where, when they married, how old they are and make sure they are invited to the local age appropriate activities - Xmas teas, golden wedding anniversaries, locale fêtes. You can be lonely if you want but not because you fell off the radar and haven't the opportunity to join in. Community spirit and socialism with a small "s" at work.
Have a lovely time on Thursday hugging the new baby.
Around here we see lots of people who are seen as a burden. They have a short stay in hospital where friends and family rush around to help but as the instant recovery turns into a linger and the fun of doing their shopping wears out and the visits become yet another tiresome session of listing woes suddenly people are too busy, or often focusing on their own ills, and we find a person left trapped unwilling to embrace technology (internet shopping, sitting the grandchildren) and not wanting the evil nasty social services to get involved they turn down all help until they are left quite angry and scared.
Transport seems our biggest barrier; public transport seems to be the issue. People really don't like it and are so used to a car that when they can't drive they feel so trapped.
They don't have to be large affairs or just social - 4 can meet to play whist or bridge. It only takes 2 to go for a walk but with a walking group you get to see new places and chat to different people along the way. Great way to meet new people and find new places. People can meet to draw/paint/sew/knit/sculpt/woodwork together. Age UK are running a project called Men in Sheds to get isolated men out of the house and talking and realising they are not alone in their isolation.
I'm not big on large groups of strange people either but if you try a common interest you make new friends with whom to share experiences and goodies. We aren't going to meet new friends at work, school or church but dancing, golf and patchwork get us out and about as does the gardening group. Come spring, we'll see what the local over 60s club has to offer and what we can offer in return. Still trying to find a local U3A.
I don't still participate in all of these, but since I retired I've joined art, craft, conversational French, gardening, novel appreciation and natural history groups in the U3A here. No time to be bored or lonely - but I'm lucky to be fit and active.
My daughter's just posted this photo on Facebook. Kittens don't make tree decorating easier...
Since 2019 I've lived in east Clare, in the west of Ireland.
Things are by no means perfect here but the opportunities to socialise and be a part of a community are greater and seen as vital. No-one is forced to join in. I expect it's different in the biggest cities but here and where we were in Belgium the council websites have a "vie associative" page that lists all the local clubs and groups for all ages and activities from sport to culture with a person to contact.
Liri, that looks like fun. I think we'll have to close the door when we do our tree as the dogs will get under foot and the pussies will try to help. Minstrel has already learned that if she wants to attract my attention she just has to climb into my hibiscus sinensis in the living room........... They did both help me put it all away last year.
I
Bit bigger now.
Vendée - 20kms from Atlantic coast.
"The price good men (and women) pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men (and women)."
Posts
Snap!
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
They don't have to be large affairs or just social - 4 can meet to play whist or bridge. It only takes 2 to go for a walk but with a walking group you get to see new places and chat to different people along the way. Great way to meet new people and find new places. People can meet to draw/paint/sew/knit/sculpt/woodwork together. Age UK are running a project called Men in Sheds to get isolated men out of the house and talking and realising they are not alone in their isolation.
I'm not big on large groups of strange people either but if you try a common interest you make new friends with whom to share experiences and goodies. We aren't going to meet new friends at work, school or church but dancing, golf and patchwork get us out and about as does the gardening group. Come spring, we'll see what the local over 60s club has to offer and what we can offer in return. Still trying to find a local U3A.
Obelixx, you are fortunate in being a strong and resourceful person, but not everyone sees things like you.
For many people, particularly men, it can be very hard to make the leap, from knowing you are lonely, to actually being able to do something about it.
This can easily become a downward spiral, the longer you are lonely, the lower your self esteem, and the less likely you are to try and solve the problem.
When you don't even know who's in the team
S.Yorkshire/Derbyshire border
My Mum loved the U3A
. Dad did short mat bowls and ballroom dancing. Both hated the school summer holidays when all the clubs and things would stop for 2 months.
A friend's mother said it was the long winter evenings - especially Sundays - she hated. She wasn't confident going out alone after dark. The days were OK, weekdays no problem, and in summer the evenings are short. But in Winter, once she'd come in from church on a Sunday afternoon, she'd shut the front door and then that was it - on her own until Monday morning
.
“It's still magic even if you know how it's done.”
Evening.
I think that some people naturally enjoy and crave the company of others, and some do not. Bereavement, ill health or anxiety can make those who may benefit from socialising avoid it in the first place.
On a lighter note - I have been mesmerised by a small flock of Fieldfares in my garden today! I first thought they were Mistle Thrush but my little binoculars helped me see their detail for an I.D.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fieldfare
(A poor quality pic from my phone with the binoculars in front of the lens!)
I'm packing my bags!
Around here we see lots of people who are seen as a burden. They have a short stay in hospital where friends and family rush around to help but as the instant recovery turns into a linger and the fun of doing their shopping wears out and the visits become yet another tiresome session of listing woes suddenly people are too busy, or often focusing on their own ills, and we find a person left trapped unwilling to embrace technology (internet shopping, sitting the grandchildren) and not wanting the evil nasty social services to get involved they turn down all help until they are left quite angry and scared.
Transport seems our biggest barrier; public transport seems to be the issue. People really don't like it and are so used to a car that when they can't drive they feel so trapped.
That's a great photo, considering how it was taken.
I wouldn't manage that degree of coordination.
When you don't even know who's in the team
S.Yorkshire/Derbyshire border
The Royal Voluntary Service also do a sheds project - got some photos of one of our local groups today and truth be told it looked hilarious fun.
I have a favourite social group that the RVS supports; they positively bend over backwards to help their family.
Unfortunately we're so bad at advertising what we do - like our lunch clubs - that people can't make the leap for help.
I love the U3A too, Raisingirl.
I don't still participate in all of these, but since I retired I've joined art, craft, conversational French, gardening, novel appreciation and natural history groups in the U3A here. No time to be bored or lonely - but I'm lucky to be fit and active.
My daughter's just posted this photo on Facebook. Kittens don't make tree decorating easier...
Things are by no means perfect here but the opportunities to socialise and be a part of a community are greater and seen as vital. No-one is forced to join in. I expect it's different in the biggest cities but here and where we were in Belgium the council websites have a "vie associative" page that lists all the local clubs and groups for all ages and activities from sport to culture with a person to contact.
Liri, that looks like fun. I think we'll have to close the door when we do our tree as the dogs will get under foot and the pussies will try to help. Minstrel has already learned that if she wants to attract my attention she just has to climb into my hibiscus sinensis in the living room........... They did both help me put it all away last year.
Bit bigger now.