Yesterday I took my closest friend to another friends funeral. A great celebration for a wonderful lady, 400 mourners!, but I kept wondering what was going on in my friend's mind because she was diagnosed with terminal cancer in Oct. and there is no certainty as to how long my friend has left.
On her good days we go out and have lunch/coffee/tea, on her bad days we just sit it out and look forward to the next good day.
People have been so kind to us, letting me drive my car as close as possible to the cafe/restaurant, as my friend can no longer walk very far and has a problem with slope and steps.
I just keep reminding myself, if my friend can remain positive in her situation, then it is up to me to do the same. I think the feeling of being helpless to do anything to help with my friend's treatment is what I feel so frustrated about. The hospital is doing everything possible to keep her comfortable so what more can we ask.
So sorry to hear about your friend Joyce, I have a very close friend and I can't imagine how I would feel in your shoes.
On a practical note she should be able to apply for a blue badge that you can use when you take her out I think you should be able to find out more on the internet or perhaps she could ask her doctor if he knows how to apply.
Hi Joyce, as someone who recently lost a friend who was very ill, I have at least a small idea about what you and your friend are going through. DfA has the right idea with the Macmillan page, I hope you both get the support you need to get through this
I dunno if you;re religious, but I'll have a little prayer for you and your friend.
Came on here to post my news but it is nothing really compared to others troubles
Lyn please phone doc, You need some medical input/help with your situation, and mum needs assistance
Anyway am to have mastectomy on Tuesday 13th - my other tests are all showing negative results so once the Beast is cut away it should be the end of it - no chemo, probably no radiotherapy (won't know until results of op), hormone therapy for next 5 years. Oh and I am a suitable candidate for an immediate implant/ To me it's all good positive news.
Roll on Tuesday to set off on next step up the ladder.
Thats great news Matty, remember when I told you about my cousin, thats is exactly the same as yours, and 12 years later she is still perfectly fine, I think this is all looking very positive for you.
Mum wont hear of sending for doctor, nurse, hospital, tablets, nothing. I am just going to let her do as she wishes, see to her daily needs and leave her go. My family said they would all stand by me in the case of a neglect claim against me.
Probably better she slips away with pneumonia than wait for the cancer to flare up, lesser of the two evils. In the mean time I will carry on being very patient with her.
Its all very silly because in September they told us she only had weeks, not months, now they say, from the last urine test there is no sign of the lump altering, changing or growing, she has no pain and if we didnt know about it, you couldnt tell she had it.
If she got her lungs right, she would be ok, but she wont hear of it, and my mum is one you really dont want to cross!!
Thank you for your support, and I really feel for Joyce, I know that feeling of being helpless in the situation.
Gardening on the wild, windy west side of Dartmoor.
Posts
Feel shattered.
Yesterday I took my closest friend to another friends funeral. A great celebration for a wonderful lady, 400 mourners!, but I kept wondering what was going on in my friend's mind because she was diagnosed with terminal cancer in Oct. and there is no certainty as to how long my friend has left.
On her good days we go out and have lunch/coffee/tea, on her bad days we just sit it out and look forward to the next good day.
People have been so kind to us, letting me drive my car as close as possible to the cafe/restaurant, as my friend can no longer walk very far and has a problem with slope and steps.
I just keep reminding myself, if my friend can remain positive in her situation, then it is up to me to do the same. I think the feeling of being helpless to do anything to help with my friend's treatment is what I feel so frustrated about. The hospital is doing everything possible to keep her comfortable so what more can we ask.
So sorry to hear about your friend Joyce, I have a very close friend and I can't imagine how I would feel in your shoes.
On a practical note she should be able to apply for a blue badge that you can use when you take her out I think you should be able to find out more on the internet or perhaps she could ask her doctor if he knows how to apply.
Joyce, I'm so sorry to hear about your friend - it is very hard isn't it - I lost a very dear friend to cancer not so long ago.
Macmillan help isn't just for those who have cancer; they provide support for relatives and friends too - have a look at Macmillan Connected here http://www.macmillan.org.uk/HowWeCanHelp/TalkToUs/Talktous.aspx?origin=homepage-penguinlinks
I hope that you find the support that is right for you.
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Hi Joyce, as someone who recently lost a friend who was very ill, I have at least a small idea about what you and your friend are going through. DfA has the right idea with the Macmillan page, I hope you both get the support you need to get through this
I dunno if you;re religious, but I'll have a little prayer for you and your friend.
Hi
Came on here to post my news but it is nothing really compared to others troubles
Lyn please phone doc, You need some medical input/help with your situation, and mum needs assistance
Anyway am to have mastectomy on Tuesday 13th - my other tests are all showing negative results so once the Beast is cut away it should be the end of it - no chemo, probably no radiotherapy (won't know until results of op), hormone therapy for next 5 years. Oh and I am a suitable candidate for an immediate implant/ To me it's all good positive news.
Roll on Tuesday to set off on next step up the ladder.
Matty, thats great news. Very best wishes, love and hugs. x
Joyce so very sorry to hear about your friend. Very best wishes to you both.
Really good news Matty - good luck on Tuesday.
Joyce - others have said wise things - your friendship through thick and thin will be very precious
Thats great news Matty, remember when I told you about my cousin, thats is exactly the same as yours, and 12 years later she is still perfectly fine, I think this is all looking very positive for you.
Mum wont hear of sending for doctor, nurse, hospital, tablets, nothing. I am just going to let her do as she wishes, see to her daily needs and leave her go. My family said they would all stand by me in the case of a neglect claim against me.
Probably better she slips away with pneumonia than wait for the cancer to flare up, lesser of the two evils. In the mean time I will carry on being very patient with her.
Its all very silly because in September they told us she only had weeks, not months, now they say, from the last urine test there is no sign of the lump altering, changing or growing, she has no pain and if we didnt know about it, you couldnt tell she had it.
If she got her lungs right, she would be ok, but she wont hear of it, and my mum is one you really dont want to cross!!
Thank you for your support, and I really feel for Joyce, I know that feeling of being helpless in the situation.