My mum is worse than ever with her lungs full of fluid she doesnt even need to cough, she walks about 6 yards and is so breathless she just flops onto her bed or chair and has to wait till she can get her breath back, she doesnt want the doctor in, she thinks they will take her away, and if I am really honest, would she be better slipping away with lack of oxygen and pneumonia than waiting for the cancer to get a hold.?
She is eating well, small meals but 3 good ones a day, plus a big bowl of mixed fresh fruit lots of tea, coffee and chocolate. She will drink about 1·5lts of water as well.
If we could clear her lungs and IMO, although no expert, get some oxygen into her, she would feel a lot better. But is she happy as she is? I dont know, so is she best left? I dont know that either.
I do know that when I spoke to the doctor on the telephone in December, he said if I didnt report anything, they would treat it as a neglect case?
So, at the moment I am very torn between going over her head and calling him in, or just leaving her go. Found the perfect smilie here
Gardening on the wild, windy west side of Dartmoor.
Verdun would your mother take kindly to a milkshake? There's something called Complan that's a nutritional drink with everything you need that the nursing home should know all about. It really isn't that unpleasant and comes in a variety of flavours (I use it when my stomach flares - doctors can prescribe it or you can buy it off the shelf at supermarkets and chemists). Though to be honest if she just wanted (for instance) tinned peaches and custard I hope she gets them!
Lyn what an awful situation to be in. Could you ask a doctor to visit, to cover yourself from any threats of neglect, but also to check that there isn't something they can do (without copious tests and prodding at) to make her more comfortable like the nebuliser suggested? You can reassure your mother she's well within her rights to refuse to go into hospital so you're not betraying her by calling someone in.
My mum had motor neurone disease and couldn't cough. We had a physio in one day and she cleared mums chest and showed us how to do it. Might be worth a try?
good luck
Weeds are flowers, too, once you get to know them.” A A Milne
I think I may phone the doctor, or maybe the district nurses, there seems no point in keep giving anti biotics, a nebuliser or physio sounds mord like it.
The problem is that she wont walk about, she ralled round a bit before Christmas and decorated her tree but was too puffed to do anything else, she walks for less than 5 minutes in 24 hours, so all her day is spent either laying in bed, sofa or comfy chair.
She just will not have it when I say she would be better sitting up or little stroll up and down the passage.
Thank you for all the suggestions, Dove, never feel you are giving unwanted help, I am sure your advise is sound and you know more than me,
Gardening on the wild, windy west side of Dartmoor.
Lyn, phone the doctor, the fluid in the lungs can be treated , and she can have oxygen therapy at home if her sats are low. My dad always said he felt a bit better when he had the oxygen, even if it was a bit of a comfort blanket. They cannot make your mum go into hospital if she doesn't want to.
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My mum is worse than ever with her lungs full of fluid she doesnt even need to cough, she walks about 6 yards and is so breathless she just flops onto her bed or chair and has to wait till she can get her breath back, she doesnt want the doctor in, she thinks they will take her away, and if I am really honest, would she be better slipping away with lack of oxygen and pneumonia than waiting for the cancer to get a hold.?
She is eating well, small meals but 3 good ones a day, plus a big bowl of mixed fresh fruit lots of tea, coffee and chocolate. She will drink about 1·5lts of water as well.
If we could clear her lungs and IMO, although no expert, get some oxygen into her, she would feel a lot better. But is she happy as she is? I dont know, so is she best left? I dont know that either.
I do know that when I spoke to the doctor on the telephone in December, he said if I didnt report anything, they would treat it as a neglect case?
So, at the moment I am very torn between going over her head and calling him in, or just leaving her go. Found the perfect smilie here
Lyn so very sorry to hear your mum is so poorly. Thinking of you and your mum. My very best wishes, love and hugs xx
Thank you, SGL, Runnybeak and everyone, much appreciated.
Verdun, do you think our mums are in competition with each other
Verdun would your mother take kindly to a milkshake? There's something called Complan that's a nutritional drink with everything you need that the nursing home should know all about. It really isn't that unpleasant and comes in a variety of flavours (I use it when my stomach flares - doctors can prescribe it or you can buy it off the shelf at supermarkets and chemists). Though to be honest if she just wanted (for instance) tinned peaches and custard I hope she gets them!
Lyn what an awful situation to be in. Could you ask a doctor to visit, to cover yourself from any threats of neglect, but also to check that there isn't something they can do (without copious tests and prodding at) to make her more comfortable like the nebuliser suggested? You can reassure your mother she's well within her rights to refuse to go into hospital so you're not betraying her by calling someone in.
Lyn ((hugs)) Clari's suggestion sounds good to me.
Also you may well have thought of this, but could Marie Curie be of any help?
https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help/terminal-illness/manage-symptoms/fluid-build-up-oedema
It sounds to me as if your mum is determined to remain at home, and that's what Marie Curie are all about.
Sometimes we can be so close to a situation that we can't see the wood for the trees, so please forgive me if I'm teaching my grandmother to suck eggs
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Lyn, hideous situation to be in. I do sympathise
My mum had motor neurone disease and couldn't cough. We had a physio in one day and she cleared mums chest and showed us how to do it. Might be worth a try?
good luck
A A Milne
I think I may phone the doctor, or maybe the district nurses, there seems no point in keep giving anti biotics, a nebuliser or physio sounds mord like it.
The problem is that she wont walk about, she ralled round a bit before Christmas and decorated her tree but was too puffed to do anything else, she walks for less than 5 minutes in 24 hours, so all her day is spent either laying in bed, sofa or comfy chair.
She just will not have it when I say she would be better sitting up or little stroll up and down the passage.
Thank you for all the suggestions, Dove, never feel you are giving unwanted help, I am sure your advise is sound and you know more than me,
Lyn , 're doctor and neglect ...... you don't think the doctor was covering his backside do you? Or it's him that not picked up on summat ?
Lyn, phone the doctor, the fluid in the lungs can be treated , and she can have oxygen therapy at home if her sats are low. My dad always said he felt a bit better when he had the oxygen, even if it was a bit of a comfort blanket. They cannot make your mum go into hospital if she doesn't want to.