A very dear friend of ours died on Sunday, funeral next week, his son has dug the grave and wants my OH to help him fill in.
I dont really blame myself as such, but I am so annoyed with the whole situation as if she had told me none of this would have happened.
I dont thing it was the paramedics job to have a go at me, his job is with the patient, if and only if, he suspected any fowl play, then he should have phoned social services, not take it upon himself to judge me. I was upset enough, as was said before dehydration causes all sorts of problems, she was shaking and. Jittering couldnt keep still.
He made her get out of bed on her own, she nearly fell and I had to hold her, my daughter said,,,I hope you got his name mum!
Gardening on the wild, windy west side of Dartmoor.
Sorry Lyn, but that paramedic is a dick! How dare he tell you anything! We all know what the older generation are like, as far as your mom thinks- you are a child to be protected. She is very fortunate to have you there, you are doing a fantastic job x
Its dammed hard to drink an apprpriate amount when you are well, its even harder when you feel ill and just want to be left alone, it sounds like a drip is the best thing,she will feel much better in a couple of days, but it probably wont be the last time she ends up dehydrated, this is obviously how she deals with things. If anyone should get a telling off, its the doc who saw her earlier in the week.
Best wishes to your mom for a speedy recovery, i hope you have been able to get some sleep and feel a little better x
Lyn - my Dad hid a lot of stuff from me and my sister too. Please don't feel guilty - you can only do what you can do, and I think you do an awful lot more than many people who care for parents. x
A horrible time for you with the news of your friend too.
PS - your daughter's right
It's a place where beautiful isn't enough of a word....
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
Lyn - I echo what the others have said - IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT! Elderly parents can be so difficult, bless 'em. But do make a formal complaint to the Ambulance Trust about that Paramedic!!!
Verdun - hydration is so important - not enough fluid leads to severe confusion - Pa was in hospital and was given a few weeks to live on his 90th birthday - now he's in The Lovely Home and coming up to 95 which just shows you what proper care can do! The carers monitor how much fluid he has and if he hasn't had enough his favourite carer comes and sits with him and encourages (flirts) with him until he's had his allotted amount!
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
I used to teach Health & Social Care and one of the main parts of the course was about treating people with respect and dignity, service users AND their families, who are often the most useful source of information. I am appalled to hear of such awful practices that go on. One of the most difficult things for my students was finding as job after the course because of lack of experience - I think nearly all of them would have done a far better job than a number of the so called carers described on here experience or not!
I wish all well and hope you manage to find some of the more caring members of the profession to support both you and your loved ones.
“Coffee. Garden. Coffee. Does a good morning need anything else?” —Betsy Cañas Garmon
Thank you every one for your thoughts and care, its very difficult especially with this drinking lark, or when they tell you they are ok and they are not, she looked ok last week and as soon as I detected she was not good I called the doctor out.
You are all very kind and I really do take note of the comments even if I dont reply, thank you.
Gardening on the wild, windy west side of Dartmoor.
The thing is a lot of elderly people seem to cut back on their liquid intake because getting to the loo can be difficult, or they can be afraid of/embarrased by 'leakages'.
The problem is that the more concentrated the urine, the more likely it is that they will get urinary tract infections or 'urgent need to visit'.
Quite often as soon as someone finds out that many/most elderly people use some form of 'protection' and that it's quite acceptable in polite society, they're happier to follow instructions to drink a bit more.
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
I have phoned the hospital, just as I said, catheter in, loads of fluids via a drip, the stoma has worked of its own accord, thank goodness for that, that was my main worry.
They want to keep her in for a couple of days to get the fluid levels up and then want to do a kidney test, they said there can be a 'kidney injury' when they get so dehydrated.
thank you everyone.
Gardening on the wild, windy west side of Dartmoor.
Try to make sure that they keep her in long enough after the saline drip is removed, to get her used to drinking enough by mouth. So often they rehydrate them then discharge - then they get dehydrated again. It's the 1:1 support in hospital that is so important for the elderly confused.
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Posts
A very dear friend of ours died on Sunday, funeral next week, his son has dug the grave and wants my OH to help him fill in.
I dont really blame myself as such, but I am so annoyed with the whole situation as if she had told me none of this would have happened.
I dont thing it was the paramedics job to have a go at me, his job is with the patient, if and only if, he suspected any fowl play, then he should have phoned social services, not take it upon himself to judge me. I was upset enough, as was said before dehydration causes all sorts of problems, she was shaking and. Jittering couldnt keep still.
He made her get out of bed on her own, she nearly fell and I had to hold her, my daughter said,,,I hope you got his name mum!
Its dammed hard to drink an apprpriate amount when you are well, its even harder when you feel ill and just want to be left alone, it sounds like a drip is the best thing,she will feel much better in a couple of days, but it probably wont be the last time she ends up dehydrated, this is obviously how she deals with things. If anyone should get a telling off, its the doc who saw her earlier in the week.
Best wishes to your mom for a speedy recovery, i hope you have been able to get some sleep and feel a little better x
Lyn - my Dad hid a lot of stuff from me and my sister too. Please don't feel guilty - you can only do what you can do, and I think you do an awful lot more than many people who care for parents. x
A horrible time for you with the news of your friend too.
PS - your daughter's right
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
Lyn - I echo what the others have said - IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT! Elderly parents can be so difficult, bless 'em. But do make a formal complaint to the Ambulance Trust about that Paramedic!!!
Verdun - hydration is so important - not enough fluid leads to severe confusion - Pa was in hospital and was given a few weeks to live on his 90th birthday - now he's in The Lovely Home and coming up to 95 which just shows you what proper care can do! The carers monitor how much fluid he has and if he hasn't had enough his favourite carer comes and sits with him and encourages (flirts) with him until he's had his allotted amount!
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
I used to teach Health & Social Care and one of the main parts of the course was about treating people with respect and dignity, service users AND their families, who are often the most useful source of information. I am appalled to hear of such awful practices that go on. One of the most difficult things for my students was finding as job after the course because of lack of experience - I think nearly all of them would have done a far better job than a number of the so called carers described on here experience or not!
I wish all well and hope you manage to find some of the more caring members of the profession to support both you and your loved ones.
Thank you every one for your thoughts and care, its very difficult especially with this drinking lark, or when they tell you they are ok and they are not, she looked ok last week and as soon as I detected she was not good I called the doctor out.
You are all very kind and I really do take note of the comments even if I dont reply, thank you.
The thing is a lot of elderly people seem to cut back on their liquid intake because getting to the loo can be difficult, or they can be afraid of/embarrased by 'leakages'.
The problem is that the more concentrated the urine, the more likely it is that they will get urinary tract infections or 'urgent need to visit'.
Quite often as soon as someone finds out that many/most elderly people use some form of 'protection' and that it's quite acceptable in polite society, they're happier to follow instructions to drink a bit more.
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
I have phoned the hospital, just as I said, catheter in, loads of fluids via a drip, the stoma has worked of its own accord, thank goodness for that, that was my main worry.
They want to keep her in for a couple of days to get the fluid levels up and then want to do a kidney test, they said there can be a 'kidney injury' when they get so dehydrated.
thank you everyone.
Try to make sure that they keep her in long enough after the saline drip is removed, to get her used to drinking enough by mouth. So often they rehydrate them then discharge - then they get dehydrated again. It's the 1:1 support in hospital that is so important for the elderly confused.
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.