Seeking advice - gravel area

w2tkc4y9dtvXGHZNxu · April 2023

Hi thankyou for taking the time to read my post. I am a first time garden owner and have lived in my property under a year now. I am a single mum and full time carer to special needs children. After spending what feels like forever gradually getting my home to a point it feels “homely” and a nice calming environment for myself and my children I have recently taken on the garden in hopes to have it to a point by summer that we can all enjoy spending time out there together. I am an autistic / adhd / ocd adult and some parts of this project have been impulsive but also grasped the hyper focus part of my brain real hard - this section especially. I have spent the past 2 weeks using what tools I currently have shifting 24 council paving slabs and stacking them (in hopes someone will want them for free) , ripping up weeds, and digging up grass + burying it and shifting from the ground 10+ carrier bags of rocks. Now my end goal here (sorry to waffle on I am aware I do this apoligies) is to flatten this ground out with a tamper I am going to order this week - then lay weed membrane which I already have and pea shingle gravel (also stacked up ready) with nice wood effect stepping stones going to the back of the garden (and in future lots of decorative things) The more Reading I have done and conflicted information I have gathered over past week has set my anxiety into overdrive about a couple of things - it is likely I will not be able to get the ground completely level. It is still incredibly rocky - with some small stumps buried I have not been able to dig out (I am not very fit with very low muscle mass and what I have done so far has felt back breaking) one stump that is big can be seen on the photo (looks abit like a giant nipple currently after my kids have had at it) I am paying someone who is going to come and dig out for me so that is not a problem. I am wondering if I should lay sand over the ground after tampering it then tamper again to get it extra flat before laying my membrane? Could be work? Could this also be beneficial in stopping rocks that are left from piercing my fabric and also help stop weeds in the future? If not lay it on top of the fabric then attempt to tamper it before laying my gravel? Sorry for extra long post again, I am overwhelmed but determined. I have never had a garden before and I love to challenge myself but at the same time I am on a tight budget with no knowledge in this area. Any help is very much welcome. ^_^

Mrs-B3-Southampton,-Hants · April 2023

I have no advice about your path, which sounds as if it's going to look good, but may I congratulate you on your efforts so far.

Fairygirl · April 2023

Hi @w2tkc4y9dtvXGHZNxu - I can understand the process - both mental and physical, so I know how easy it is to get frustrated about getting to a stage where you feel it should be easier, yet it seems to be just as complicated! Always something to thwart the plan

Once you have the big stump out, it will be much easier to get the ground more level, and suitable for the membrane/gravel. If you feel sand would be useful to get it to a better level, then go ahead with that, however- once you have the pea gravel down, it's quite easy to get a good level with that - it'll just be shallower in the bits where there are a few lumps, and deeper in the lower areas. It's the big advantage of gravel - a great leveller. As long as you can still get a decent depth of gravel so that it doesn't spill over into the grass or the concrete at the bottom of the pic, that'll be fine. I have an area here where I removed a bed I created several years ago, and want my bench in there, but there's a large lump of concrete which I have no chance of getting out without machinery. I'll just be adding more gravel in the area around it, and there are some ground hugging plants which will also be nearby to help disguise it.
Don't worry too much about tamping it all down either - that will happen naturally over time.

Don't worry about any existing rocks piercing the fabric - you can double up the membrane if you have enough, but holes will naturally occur over time anyway. Weeds will still seed in from outside, but if you have a good depth of gravel [ 2 or 3 inches is ideal] they're pretty easy to remove. I'd consider getting the stepping stones mortared in though - they might slide a bit on the gravel/membrane, which could be tricky with youngsters using it. I don't want to add to your workload, and there's ready mixed mortar available which is easy to use, but it might help to avoid any accidents.
The only thing I'd say about pea gravel is that it can be a huge cat litter tray, so you may want to add some larger gravel to mix with it. I know that's a bit of a pain to hear, but it may save you a more unpleasant job than pulling weeds out, especially with your children playing out there.
Most importantly, keep the thought in your mind that in a month or two, you'll all be able to get out there and enjoy your space, and give yourself a massive pat on the back for your achievement.

Loxley · April 2023

I think tamping the ground down prior to laying the gravel is sensible, but you don't have to get it perfectly flat - you can just rake the surface of the gravel flat when laid!

I would advise stone or slate chippings rather than pea gravel - they are much better at 'staying put' and are easier to walk on. Pea gravel rolls everywhere and if it is too deep, is really arduous to trudge through. An edge between the gravel and the lawn would be a good idea; timber fence posts pegged in place would do the trick.

The fabric is only going to do so much to stop weeds. You are more likely to have weeds appearing in the gravel from wind blown seeds, rather than coming up from the ground. It's very easy to remove weeds from gravel though - if you get them in time.

JennyJ · April 2023

Just a note of caution - when you say "and in future lots of decorative things" do you mean plants, or something else? If you plan to plant through the gravel and membrane too much firming/tamping down will hinder growth so you'd probably have to peel back a fair area of membrane to loosen up the soil prior to planting.

GardenerSuze · April 2023

@w2tkc4y9dtvXGHZNxu Thankyou, I saw your post earlier today. Now I have time to sit appreciate, read and understand what you are in the process of achieving.
I knew that someone else that writes regularly on the forum would be able to offer and understand the kind of advice you need. That advise has been kindly and thoughtfully given as always.
Having worked as a gardener, it is easy to see from your photo that you have worked very hard which I admire. Having a place to play is so important for kids , I hope you all enjoy the summer.

GardenerSuze · April 2023

@bede I have no idea why you posted on this thread other than to draw attention to yourself. Writing in capital letters shows you are shouting. There is no need for it, as you clearly had nothing constructive to add. It would have been better if you had simply ignored and posted nothing.

I will offer my apologies to this first time poster as you clearly incapable of doing so yourself.

tui34 · April 2023

Hello @w2tkc4y9dtvXGHZNxu Bravo!! And welcome to the Sore Back Club!! What a huge job you have taken on. I can't advise but I admire your pluck. We'd love to see some "after" photos if you have time. Rock on!!

Oh! How rude @Bédé You really have no manners!!

w2tkc4y9dtvXGHZNxu · April 2023

Thankyou for the kind and thoughtful advice.

I’m going to buy some slightly larger stone chippings/gravel so mix with the shingle I already have piled enough which doesn’t look like enough anyway and also buy another layer of membrane so I can double up.
I am going to attempt some sand to level ground a little just wondering what kind of sand might be best .. Perhaps pavers or sharp sand? I may be overthinking and maybe it doesn’t make a difference at all lol but this is as I understand going to be a lot of trial and error as I go probably.

I won’t be planting anything so this makes it easier, I’m abit of a plastic plant addict in my home (not proud) as I’m terrible at keeping plants alive and away from my cats destroying them, so this will follow through into my garden. As for edging definately a must, I already have some picked out on Amazon that looks like bricks but I believe is some kind of heavy duty rubber. Definately going to need it as the back section of my garden I’m going to be throwing thick layer of wood chips over.

Really good advice also on putting mortor under my stepping stones (don’t actually fully know what it is or how to put it down so I’ll have to watch some videos and clue myself up abit) I hadn’t thought of them possibily slipping around on the membrane but makes sense now.
Will be sure to post an update photo when I get to a point I’m happy with. ^_^

KeenOnGreen · April 2023

Well done so far! We have lot of gravel/membrane in our garden. You would ideally need to get "the nipple" out, and any big rocks/stones, but from your photo I would say it looks ready to put down the membrane. Be aware that there are roughly speaking two different types generally available:

1) This soft and thin, and feels a bit like cloth. It tends to rip/tear easily, and in my experience breaks down over time much quickly. I would avoid it, unless your budget forces you to go for that option, as it is usually cheaper than option 2.
2) This is a much thicker membrane, made of woven plastic, and it is shiny to look at. It is much tougher than option 1. If you leave the edges expose they easily fray, but as long as you fold them over and pin them, then it is pretty tough and last a lot longer. We have found this to be much better.

I wouldn't say you need a tamper, or any sand. If you can comfortable walk up and down on the path in trainers or slippers, as it is now, then it is probably smooth enough already.

We have pea gravel, and although our dog does poo in it regularly, we find it very easy to pick up. If it's very runny (sorry to be so yucky), then we just get a watering can and water it in, and it just disappears. Your garden with help a lot with the mental and physical problems you mention, just take it easy, and remember to sit and enjoy it a lot.

Fairygirl · April 2023

I would agree with @KeenOnGreen that you probably don't need any sand, but it's hard to judge when we're not seeing the ground for ourselves. You'll have to decide yourself which is going to be better - but if there are a lot of dips and hollows, you'll need more gravel to fill it, and that could be more expensive than adding some sand. You'll also find that whatever amount of gravel you have - you'll probably need more!
As far as the sand is concerned - it won't make a lot of difference if you decide to get it. I think you're slightly confused though - pavers are the blocks you can use as a hard surface or edging. Just get whatever's cheapest.
Mortar is just the 'glue' for sticking down anything solid outdoors. It's what hold bricks together in walls. Unless the stepping stones are huge, you won't need much for each one - two or three good blobs about the size of your hand. I use the ready mix stuff which just needs water added to it. Take a look at B&Q's website , or similar, and you'll see the stuff that's available. I got some recently for fixing a loose step, and for making concrete for another small job. It's around a tenner for a decent sized bag. You'll need something to mix it in - a wheelbarrow if you have one, or just a bucket or trug. It might be better to put them down onto the ground, rather than the membrane though. You can simply cut a section of the membrane away in order to do that

I'll see if I can find the stuff I bought and give you a link to it.
Here you go-
https://www.diy.com/departments/blue-circle-quality-assured-ready-mixed-mortar-20kg-bag/35726_BQ.prd

Seeking advice - gravel area

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