It's about cultural change isn't it? That makes it a huge task, but also one where there are many valuable steps that can be taken. It's not inevitable that men behave this way, because we know many who do not.
Education: sex and relationships education that starts in primary school and centres consent and respect for others from the get-go. Discussion of implicit bias, on the basis of sex, gender, race, in schools, rather than pretending it doesn't exist. Systems for the reporting and management of harassment between pupils.
Policing: more isn't necessarily the answer, but given the tory cuts over the last decade it could make a difference. Only if it's directed appropriately though: the forces need to totally overhaul their approach to domestic and sexual violence.Ā
Law: on the spot fines for sexual and racial harassment on our streets. Men should know that if a police officer is in ear shot when they shout obscenities at schoolgirls from their white van, they will be dealt with rather than benignly tolerated. Men should know that if they abuse or coerce their partner there are services said partner can use that will keep them safe AND deal with the crimes committed.Ā
So much of this is just changing our world in simple ways to keep saying This Is Not OK. Rather than collectively looking the other way, or sighing and suggesting it's inevitable, or blaming the victims.
I heard a rather scary statistic on Ch4 news last night about the number of cases of sexual assaultĀ and even rape from the partners of police offices which were not followed up in any way
One of the comforts of getting older was to be able to walk past scaffolding without harassment. After a certain age, women become invisible. That suited me fine.
ā¦ā¦Ā Men think very differently to women, they always will.Ā
No they donāt @Lyn ā¦ not in a way that excuses or even explains that sort of behaviour.Ā
Just because some men behave in that way does not mean it is a male trait or characteristic. Ā That is an insult to the many many good and decent men we all know.Ā
Gardening in Central NorfolkĀ on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
You can educate people and hopefully later they would have listened and changed their behaviour, Ā but we started off this conversation about that policeman, Ā men with that type of mindset it wouldnāt make any difference how much you told them it was wrong, Ā they will still do it if the fancy and opportunity takes them. Iām sure most of us have beautiful sons who wouldnāt dream of doing anything like that, Ā and weāve taught them well, but these others are not the same , no amount of education will stop them. There were a lot of bobbies on the beat years ago, Ā and on push bikes of course, and awful things still went on.
What about the boy that shot all those people down here the other week, he just couldnāt stop himself. Ā I definitely blame the police for that one.Ā
Gardening on the wild, windy west side of Dartmoor.Ā
I regularly went to concerts with my friend when I was a teenager, and my friend got off the bus about five mins before me. I then had a walk of around 5 to 10 mins to get home. It would always be around half 11 to midnight. I remember I was always aware that I had a 'plan' if I thought someone was following me. Residential, so I'd have gone straight up the path to a house as though it was my home. Nearly 50 years on, and my girls are still doing the same if they're out.Ā Shameful that we have come so far, but we haven't progressed at all.Ā
It's a place where beautiful isn't enough of a word....
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
I agree that men should be educated as to how to help a woman feel safe. My daughter has her own rule about ā banterā. As a man ask yourself how you would feel if you were in a prison cell with a great big bloke and he said it... if you wouldnāt like it said to you in those circumstances donāt say it to a woman in any circumstances.Ā
Another tip my son would like to pass on, if you are walking at night and a woman is nearby a way to make her maybe feel safer is to have a loud conversation on your phone, talking to your imaginary wife about plans or asking how your little girl got on at school may reassure the woman that attacking her is the last thing on your mind.Ā
Sadly there is nothing that could have saved Sarah. Trying to put the blame on her or making asinine comments about buses doesnāt help anyone.Ā
@Lyn, that boy had been hanging out on internet forums devoted to incredibly misogynistic ideas that men should dominate society and women owe men sex. That sort of ideology is able to thrive because there is currently no real counter to it... it is in fact reinforced in the most part by the way we deal with violence against women. It's just not inevitable that kids like him end up brainwashed. There's the gun licence issue too of course!
Posts
Education: sex and relationships education that starts in primary school and centres consent and respect for others from the get-go. Discussion of implicit bias, on the basis of sex, gender, race, in schools, rather than pretending it doesn't exist. Systems for the reporting and management of harassment between pupils.
Policing: more isn't necessarily the answer, but given the tory cuts over the last decade it could make a difference. Only if it's directed appropriately though: the forces need to totally overhaul their approach to domestic and sexual violence.Ā
https://metro.co.uk/2021/09/29/at-least-15-police-officers-have-killed-women-in-the-last-12-years-15333214/
Gardening in Central NorfolkĀ on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
https://uk.yahoo.com/news/sarah-everard-female-gay-officers-told-to-act-straight-brian-paddick-101427822.html
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
Gardening in Central NorfolkĀ on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Iām sure most of us have beautiful sons who wouldnāt dream of doing anything like that, Ā and weāve taught them well, but these others are not the same , no amount of education will stop them.
There were a lot of bobbies on the beat years ago, Ā and on push bikes of course, and awful things still went on.
What about the boy that shot all those people down here the other week, he just couldnāt stop himself. Ā I definitely blame the police for that one.Ā
Shameful that we have come so far, but we haven't progressed at all.Ā
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...