Down in Cornwall we’re just a friendly lot of people , that’s why everyone wants to come here. And yes, I do belong to the old generation where every gave time of day to others. I’ll  take your advise and ignore everyone in future. .Â
I don't mean offence by that but it's a tricky balance between old fashioned friendliness and inappropriate these days. Unfortunately a lot of the change with kids is probably down to red tops printing plenty of stories about child abuse spreading the image that it's more of an issue now. Strangers danger when it's more likely to be someone the kid knows.Â
My view is that it's difficult to get what is acceptable and probably err on caution. I tend to let my partner talk to kids even my son's play dates. Even though I know them and their parents. It's not that I'm a risk (DBS checked whatever that means) just that parents can have issues with things. Perhaps that mother told her to spit at strangers in some strange protective thought process. It's weird and antisocial though.Â
@Lyn - that phrase about banging your head on a wall suits this thread just now. Like you, I wave and say hello to small children too. Having worked with them for many years, it's a normal thing to do . Most people are absolutely delightful in their response round here, and the children are usually great too. Long may that continue. How sad that some people are so suspicious of everyone and everything.Â
I think in London there are bylaws which make it a crime to even make eye contact with folk
You beat me to it, @Hostafan1, not bylaws but the equivalent of the Kray twins would probably sort you out in some parts. Regret to say that it, but it pays to be suspicious of most folk in Central London, not so bad in the suburbs though.Â
In our part of Devon, it’s still normal to exchange a smile with strangers if they happen to make eye contact. I often get into conversation with people I don’t know either, that’s gone on for years, I think I have an approachable face! I even speak to or smile at passing dogs which make eye contact, it always tickles me when I get a quick tail wag in acknowledgement! The further I’ve moved away from London, the friendlier people have seemed. I think London was so crowded that everyone did anything they could to maintain their personal space. I don’t know if it is even worse there now.
Why do you feel the need to say hello to strangers especially young kids? If you see them a lot or get to know them a little through familiarity but not strangers.
I'm not condoning spitting but if a stranger said hello to my son when he was very young and I'm possibly distracted picking shopping for the trolley I'd actually be bit wary of them.
Although my son was able to give adults a hard time if he felt like it. Very bright kid with an uncanny knack for coming up with something an adult would say. You can't beat him sometimes in an argument/ debate he's simply too forensic at times.Â
I think that attitude of speaking to kids you don't know is very much from another generation in time. It's kind of the new social etiquette not to and to look on those that do as a bit strange or to be wary of.Â
God above.............since when did smiling or saying Hello to someone ( be they children or adults ) you don't know if you are in a shop, in a queue, on a bus or WHY become non acceptable ? It is human nature to connect with others - nothing to do with generation. What makes saying it on Social Media and "friending" someone you don't know and can't even see so much more acceptable than saying Hello in the above circumstances? I'd suggest you and your child are more likely to come across a weird person on SMedia than in your local SMarket. If someone you don't know deliberately crossed the road to engage you or your child in conversation, that could be a different matter entirely. You would teach your child not to "talk to strangers" as a general warning ( nothing new about that) but teaching them to spit or be rude to anyone outside their circle, or to assume everyone is a bit strange is neither useful nor practical if you wish them to grow up to become part of society. Being proud of your child's ability to "give adults a hard time" sounds rather odd unless you simply mean his debating skills - unlikely to come into action when just responding to a smile or Hello from a stranger tho. I should add that I am not a parent but I would be offended if I was to be classed as someone to be wary of - in reality, that only happens when trying to offload my excess Cucumbers  Â
@Lyn - that machete you carry, and the balaclava - they're the real giveaway....
I remember being in a shopping centre when my girls were young. An old chap with a shopping bag was standing outside the doors/windows of one of the big stores - probably waiting patiently for his wife. A little child ran towards him and he bent down to say hello, smiling. The mother grabbed the child and pulled her away, giving the poor old soul a dirty look.Â
One of the saddest things I've ever seen. All I could think of was, that could have been my Dad, and how deeply he'd have been  hurt by that.Â
It's a place where beautiful isn't enough of a word....
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
My dad was the same, he loved kids,  he spoke to little girl once in Tesco and I said he shouldn’t really speak to her, her mum said,  please do, I want her to grow up to be sociable with people. Why that women though it was a good idea to teach her child to spit at people is beyond me.Â
Gardening on the wild, windy west side of Dartmoor.Â
It's just wrong isn't it? I bet a lot of men like me are scared to smile and engage with kids, simply because of being taken for some child molesting fiend. I went to a football match with my great nephew a couple of years back, and I took my camera (as I used to when my son played) and one of the parents from the team they played asked me to stop taking photos. I just give up. Maybe it was because they'd seen the crap photos I take and it was more a critical observation from them though!
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My view is that it's difficult to get what is acceptable and probably err on caution. I tend to let my partner talk to kids even my son's play dates. Even though I know them and their parents. It's not that I'm a risk (DBS checked whatever that means) just that parents can have issues with things. Perhaps that mother told her to spit at strangers in some strange protective thought process. It's weird and antisocial though.Â
I even speak to or smile at passing dogs which make eye contact, it always tickles me when I get a quick tail wag in acknowledgement!
The further I’ve moved away from London, the friendlier people have seemed. I think London was so crowded that everyone did anything they could to maintain their personal space. I don’t know if it is even worse there now.
It is human nature to connect with others - nothing to do with generation. What makes saying it on Social Media and "friending" someone you don't know and can't even see so much more acceptable than saying Hello in the above circumstances? I'd suggest you and your child are more likely to come across a weird person on SMedia than in your local SMarket.
If someone you don't know deliberately crossed the road to engage you or your child in conversation, that could be a different matter entirely.
You would teach your child not to "talk to strangers" as a general warning ( nothing new about that) but teaching them to spit or be rude to anyone outside their circle, or to assume everyone is a bit strange is neither useful nor practical if you wish them to grow up to become part of society.
Being proud of your child's ability to "give adults a hard time" sounds rather odd unless you simply mean his debating skills - unlikely to come into action when just responding to a smile or Hello from a stranger tho.
I should add that I am not a parent but I would be offended if I was to be classed as someone to be wary of - in reality, that only happens when trying to offload my excess Cucumbers
I remember being in a shopping centre when my girls were young. An old chap with a shopping bag was standing outside the doors/windows of one of the big stores - probably waiting patiently for his wife. A little child ran towards him and he bent down to say hello, smiling.Â
The mother grabbed the child and pulled her away, giving the poor old soul a dirty look.Â
One of the saddest things I've ever seen.Â
All I could think of was, that could have been my Dad, and how deeply he'd have been  hurt by that.Â
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Why that women though it was a good idea to teach her child to spit at people is beyond me.Â