What are your long term plans? Are you looking for your forever house? When you say you are either going to move or extend your current bungalow, do you mean extend up another level, or outwards into your garden? You haven't been there really very long either. Could you redesign your existing garden after the extension has been built to perhaps include areas for a vegetable patch and more flowers. My garden isn't as big as yours, but l have made use of all available space. Choose climbing roses against any fences/walls, plant a clematis or two to scramble through the roses extending the season. Roses are beautiful but are a good few weeks between flushes. I have many roses in my garden, on fences, against my shed, by my French doors, choose compact floriforous varieties and pop in a large pot. Underplant with astrantias ,hardy geraniums and geums etc. Pop in plenty of bulbs to add seasonal interest. I had a small veg patch for a few years when my kids were small. It was fun and nice to grow beans and other crops. But l turned it into another flower bed with shrubs , roses and perennials because it was bare earth for much of the year. I like you it seems have a reluctant under-gardener in my husband. How much help is he likely to be, will it cause friction if you find him unwilling to get stuck in? I too lust after many garden beauties that l simply do not have the space for, magnolia trees, acers and many others. I just remind myself that their time to shine is often too brief and am happy to admire them in other people's gardens.?
You can make something of an impression in 3 to 4 hours in a small garden, providing the weather is kind, but it goes nowhere in a large garden and very often it will rain (or freeze or snow or blow!) and make what you need to do unpleasant, difficult or impossible. Then you get behindhand and then miss deadlines for planting or pruning etc and the weeds get bigger and harder to deal with and so it goes on....
My garden is too big for me to manage on my own really, but I embrace Pansy's wild, unkempt look in the parts of the garden furthest from the house, as it helps them blend in to their rural setting. I am forever playing catch up, loving this Indian summer of dry days as I am making inroads at last.
Rarely if ever just sit and look smugly about me, but would rather have too much to do than not enough. Really enjoy getting stuck in to something physical some days and spend others pottering about. I walk round the garden most days just to see what is out, what is in need of some attention, but mostly just to enjoy the the season, flowers and insects and birdlife, scents and sounds.
Logan - Today at 14:03 - "I'd love a bigger garden, but we are both retired so have more time for the garden"
Problem is: yes, when you are retired you have plenty of time on your hands, but you are also older and sometimes not so fit, so you have to accept a garden of a "realistic" size.
At the moment our garden is 300 m² large consisting of approx. half lawn and half mixed borders etc. and I find it quite the right size to be manageable in my present health condition.
That is my big worry. After all this move if I couldnt manage time then i will feel guilty. Though I have managed to make a good progress in my current garden so there is hope as well.
I will give a bit more background. My son is moving from primary to secondary school and we are in process of selecting school. Whatever option we choose will be for next seven years till he finishes his secondary school. No idea what will we do after that. So not forever house but yes house for 7 years atleast.
I am alright with DH not working in garden. He likes my garden and that is enough for me. The extension will be mostly on side and replacing conservatory and patio, converting loft etc so I will still have 60ft of garden left. I think I can make more space for my plants if I get a tree removed and remove some of the overgrown shrubs which arent my fav as such but it still wont be my dream garden. i also make full use of the front garden, though it ends up looking messy.
I am telling myself, "be happy with what you have, dont be greedy", but it is so hard!
I agree with Papi-Jo. Since retiring, I have replanted large areas of the garden to make it more manageable as OH no longer able to help. This year, I started getting a chap to do the grass and any heavy work needing done. I could do with a smaller garden but love where I live.
Thank you so much for talking to me. Yes it is more of a dream vs reality thing. I will now let OH and son choose the school and wont try to bias them for any particular one for my unrealistic dream. Last time they did choose house over apartment for me, but this time I think I am being unreasonable.
Anyway whatever happens I will come back here for more ideas on how to make best of my garden.
So many wise words. Modern life is so busy with careers and families and friends and all the little things, too, that take up our time. Yet I think that you reach a point when it is worth asking yourself what you really want out of life - and how much you are prepared to pay for it. I don't mean just money.
When I was about the age I think you are - settled job, kids in secondary school - I realised that it was all ok but not truly satisfying. We wanted to move and I stuck out for a big garden. All that has been said above is true: it's a lot of work; it will never be perfect; now I am old it sometimes seems a bit much and I have had to modify my plans and I do feel a bit regretful about my failings BUT in 27 years it has brought me joy, solace, unlimited interest, pride, wonder.... I am moved, humbled, intrigued. In my garden I am never lonely or bored or hopeless and only unhappy if distracted by outside things.
This morning, weary, I sat for a moment on a log by the compost heap and a robin hopped down to check if I had disturbed anything edible. The day was still and pearly gray but all the autumn colours are beginning to assert themselves and there are still flowers for scent and colour. I knew there was nowhere on earth I would rather be and nothing on earth I could have done better.
You only get one life and it is true - you should think of all your family, but think of yourself, too. If you really want it, go for it. Good luck.
Posts
What are your long term plans? Are you looking for your forever house? When you say you are either going to move or extend your current bungalow, do you mean extend up another level, or outwards into your garden? You haven't been there really very long either. Could you redesign your existing garden after the extension has been built to perhaps include areas for a vegetable patch and more flowers. My garden isn't as big as yours, but l have made use of all available space. Choose climbing roses against any fences/walls, plant a clematis or two to scramble through the roses extending the season. Roses are beautiful but are a good few weeks between flushes. I have many roses in my garden, on fences, against my shed, by my French doors, choose compact floriforous varieties and pop in a large pot. Underplant with astrantias ,hardy geraniums and geums etc. Pop in plenty of bulbs to add seasonal interest. I had a small veg patch for a few years when my kids were small. It was fun and nice to grow beans and other crops. But l turned it into another flower bed with shrubs , roses and perennials because it was bare earth for much of the year. I like you it seems have a reluctant under-gardener in my husband. How much help is he likely to be, will it cause friction if you find him unwilling to get stuck in? I too lust after many garden beauties that l simply do not have the space for, magnolia trees, acers and many others. I just remind myself that their time to shine is often too brief and am happy to admire them in other people's gardens.?
You can make something of an impression in 3 to 4 hours in a small garden, providing the weather is kind, but it goes nowhere in a large garden and very often it will rain (or freeze or snow or blow!) and make what you need to do unpleasant, difficult or impossible. Then you get behindhand and then miss deadlines for planting or pruning etc and the weeds get bigger and harder to deal with and so it goes on....
My garden is too big for me to manage on my own really, but I embrace Pansy's wild, unkempt look in the parts of the garden furthest from the house, as it helps them blend in to their rural setting
. I am forever playing catch up, loving this Indian summer of dry days as I am making inroads at last.
Rarely if ever just sit and look smugly about me, but would rather have too much to do than not enough. Really enjoy getting stuck in to something physical some days and spend others pottering about. I walk round the garden most days just to see what is out, what is in need of some attention, but mostly just to enjoy the the season, flowers and insects and birdlife, scents and sounds.
It is what keeps me (more or less) sane!
Logan - Today at 14:03 - "I'd love a bigger garden, but we are both retired so have more time for the garden"
Problem is: yes, when you are retired you have plenty of time on your hands, but you are also older and sometimes not so fit, so you have to accept a garden of a "realistic" size.
At the moment our garden is 300 m² large consisting of approx. half lawn and half mixed borders etc. and I find it quite the right size to be manageable in my present health condition.
Last edited: 24 October 2016 15:45:54
@logan,
That is my big worry. After all this move if I couldnt manage time then i will feel guilty. Though I have managed to make a good progress in my current garden so there is hope as well.
@pansyface,
I like a bit of cottage style garden than the perfect maintained garden, so yes more inclined to the type 2 garden from your post.
@lilysilly,
I will give a bit more background. My son is moving from primary to secondary school and we are in process of selecting school. Whatever option we choose will be for next seven years till he finishes his secondary school. No idea what will we do after that. So not forever house but yes house for 7 years atleast.
I am alright with DH not working in garden. He likes my garden and that is enough for me. The extension will be mostly on side and replacing conservatory and patio, converting loft etc so I will still have 60ft of garden left. I think I can make more space for my plants if I get a tree removed and remove some of the overgrown shrubs which arent my fav as such but it still wont be my dream garden. i also make full use of the front garden, though it ends up looking messy.
I am telling myself, "be happy with what you have, dont be greedy", but it is so hard!
I agree with Papi-Jo. Since retiring, I have replanted large areas of the garden to make it more manageable as OH no longer able to help. This year, I started getting a chap to do the grass and any heavy work needing done. I could do with a smaller garden but love where I live.
Thank you so much for talking to me. Yes it is more of a dream vs reality thing. I will now let OH and son choose the school and wont try to bias them for any particular one for my unrealistic dream. Last time they did choose house over apartment for me, but this time I think I am being unreasonable.
Anyway whatever happens I will come back here for more ideas on how to make best of my garden.
I think we gardeners are , perhaps, always a bit , just a tiny bit unhappy?
My garden is too wet, vs my garden always needs watering.
My garden bakes in the constant sun, vs , my garden is too shady.
too big vs too small.
My garden is overlooked, vs my garden is too exposed to the elements
That kinda thing.
If you're happy where you are, you sound younger than most of us on here, I'd stick with it , at least for a while.
As my dear late Mother would have said " act in haste: repent at leisure. "
Hosta....I've said that when I leave, it will be in a box . . . . .
So many wise words. Modern life is so busy with careers and families and friends and all the little things, too, that take up our time. Yet I think that you reach a point when it is worth asking yourself what you really want out of life - and how much you are prepared to pay for it. I don't mean just money.
When I was about the age I think you are - settled job, kids in secondary school - I realised that it was all ok but not truly satisfying. We wanted to move and I stuck out for a big garden. All that has been said above is true: it's a lot of work; it will never be perfect; now I am old it sometimes seems a bit much and I have had to modify my plans and I do feel a bit regretful about my failings BUT in 27 years it has brought me joy, solace, unlimited interest, pride, wonder.... I am moved, humbled, intrigued. In my garden I am never lonely or bored or hopeless and only unhappy if distracted by outside things.
This morning, weary, I sat for a moment on a log by the compost heap and a robin hopped down to check if I had disturbed anything edible. The day was still and pearly gray but all the autumn colours are beginning to assert themselves and there are still flowers for scent and colour. I knew there was nowhere on earth I would rather be and nothing on earth I could have done better.
You only get one life and it is true - you should think of all your family, but think of yourself, too. If you really want it, go for it. Good luck.
Oh Posy, you touched my heart.