Yes Paul I understand what your saying, and regards my sister's situation the thing that makes me laugh about this is ......I was talking to this lady widow a few months after they moved in ., she was telling me what a lovely road it was ,how all the neighbours helped one another and how they all met up in the club .To think I even envied my sis when I was telling her how the neighbours were so friendly and helpfull. My brother in law felt so sorry for this neighbour he would cut her grass as all she had was a walk along mower. He thinned out in their own overgrown garden ,giving gladly and planting the shrubs the previous owners had always said she could have .....But never got on with it .!!! He replaced her tiles and mended her shed.I think she guessed he was a soft touch and gave him the sob stories Little did he know, if you didn't meet up in the club and offer your services ,tell them your life story, then your an outcast from day one. I guess you were welcome in the club if you were so friendly you bought them a round of drinks. But I suppose he learned what this helping hand meant, the hard way. .....the helping hand was his own and the idea was to help others and get nothing in return .( Nothing in a good way though) it was a bit one-sided .But he did learn .
No - and I don't think anyone said that either....
Twas always thus granma. One learns by one's mistakes, although it often takes a while, and it goes against the nature of many people if they're naturally giving. Fortunately, there are enough good stories and people around to maintain faith in the human race, although it often seems to get harder and harder.
It's a place where beautiful isn't enough of a word....
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
I haven't read the entire topic so apologies if these points have been made before.
1. If it is genuinely a shared hedge then the neighbour has as much right to a say in what is done to it as the OP. What needed to be done in advance of any work was to agree on the height the hedge was to be reduced to and how any costs were to be shared.
2. If the hedge is actually rooted in one or other of the properties, the person owning that property would be the only one entitled to make major changes to it. The person in the other property would only be entitled to cut it back to the boundary line and would not be entitled to reduce the overall height.
3. To avoid a repeat of the situation check the deeds to the house and find out if there is anything in there to define who 'owns' which boundary. There is no hard and fast rule that I'm aware of to say that you own the boundary on the left for example.
Didn’t make any difference who owned the boundaries in my case, neighbour just got a tractor in and ripped out the whole lot on my side and the other side of her. Then she had the cheek to tell me I had to rip out all the hedging on the other side of me as she couldn’t see into their garden! Thank goodness she couldn’t get the tractor into ours or she would have had that out as well.
If you get the police involved you have to declare that when you sell, so, like Philippa we just decided to move.
I think when we sell this in a few years time I’ll put it on here, I’m sure people will be falling over themselves to buy it, no neighbours, boundaries on all fours sides belong with the property and no one to rip them down.😀 The more I hear of neighbour disputes the more I feel blessed to be living here.😇
Gardening on the wild, windy west side of Dartmoor.
Actually, I think that's the entirely wrong attitude (head above parapet). If everybody thought and acted like that, the world would indeed be a poorer place. We try to be good neighbours and would always help out if needed. We're not over friendly but do chat occasionally over the proverbial garden fence. I like helping other people and if it sometimes backfires, well that's life, it wouldn't stop me doing it again.
Amen Lizzie. It is how wars start. Space sharing is power sharing and some of the toughest stuff to deal with but it is the same as negotiating with countries, ex-partners, and family. Difficult and important.
Totally agree with Lizzie and Fire ... go the extra mile, turn the other cheek and smile whenever you see your neighbours is a way of going on that has given me happy neighbourly relations in all my homes throughout my life
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
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A glow worm's never glum
Cos how can you be grumpy
When the sun shines out your bum!
and regards my sister's situation the thing that makes me laugh about this is ......I was talking to this lady widow a few months after they moved in ., she was telling me what a lovely road it was ,how all the neighbours helped one another and how they all met up in the club .To think I even envied my sis when I was telling her how the neighbours were so friendly and helpfull.
My brother in law felt so sorry for this neighbour he would cut her grass as all she had was a walk along mower. He thinned out in their own overgrown garden ,giving gladly and planting the shrubs the previous owners had always said she could have .....But never got on with it .!!!
He replaced her tiles and mended her shed.I think she guessed he was a soft touch and gave him the sob stories
Little did he know, if you didn't meet up in the club and offer your services ,tell them your life story, then your an outcast from day one. I guess you were welcome in the club if you were so friendly you bought them a round of drinks.
But I suppose he learned what this helping hand meant, the hard way. .....the helping hand was his own and the idea was to help others and get nothing in return .( Nothing in a good way though) it was a bit one-sided .But he did learn .
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Twas always thus granma. One learns by one's mistakes, although it often takes a while, and it goes against the nature of many people if they're naturally giving.
Fortunately, there are enough good stories and people around to maintain faith in the human race, although it often seems to get harder and harder.
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
If you get the police involved you have to declare that when you sell, so, like Philippa we just decided to move.
I think when we sell this in a few years time I’ll put it on here, I’m sure people will be falling over themselves to buy it, no neighbours, boundaries on all fours sides belong with the property and no one to rip them down.😀
The more I hear of neighbour disputes the more I feel blessed to be living here.😇
“It's still magic even if you know how it's done.”
all my homes throughout my life
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.