Christmas To Do List - Brian Bilston

BenCotto · December 2023

I love this

B3 · December 2023

They must've been some mince pies!

ViewAhead · December 2023

😂

I'm working through my to-do list right now. Luckily, I do not have either a cat or a spinning chair to distract me.

Fire · December 2023

My to do list:

Baileys? ✔️

Bath? ✔️

Book? ✔️

rowlandscastle444 · December 2023

Thankfully I don't have a cat to mince.
I don't think I can balance a mince pie on the bridge of my nose. I would never waste one by playing with it.
😄

Lyn · December 2023

For those stressed about the Christmas food.
Anybody get stressed about Christmas Dinner ? Read this from a butcher,

😂Just in case anyone is stressing about Christmas Day..............! 😂
Here's my top tip
🎄Christmas Dinner....
I have concluded that the inevitable stress of Christmas dinner is created by adverts, supermarkets and TV chefs...
It's a Sunday dinner for goodness sake!!!
The only difference is that you are allowed to open a bottle of wine before you open the kitchen curtains. 🍷🍷🍷

🙄We do it quite happily 51 weeks of the year but can we the consumers be trusted to manage by ourselves on one day of the year...apparently not!
Here goes...💓

1. Turkey... It's a big fecking chicken that's all, 20 minutes per lb plus 20 minutes at 180 degrees - jobs a good un! Get yourselves a meat thermometer £3 off the Internet poke it in the offending bird if it says 75 degrees or over it's cooked!👏🏼

2. Stuffing - regardless of what Jamie Oliver says, you do NOT need 2lbs of shoulder of pork, onions breadcrumbs, pine nuts and a shit load of fresh herbs to make stuffing....( no fecking wonder he's bankrupt if that's what he spends to make stuffing!)😜
What you need is Paxo and a kettle!! If you wanna liven it up squeeze 3 sausages out of their skins and mix that in with your Paxo before cooking 😉.

3. Gravy - Jamie Oliver is copping for this one as well....
Bisto Jamie.... All you need is Bisto!
I ( nor anyone else I know) has got time on Christmas Eve to piss about roasting chicken wings and vegetables, adding stock and flour,cooking it for another half hour, mashing it all up with a potato masher and then straining the whole sorry mess to make gravy 😠😠😠

4. Vegetables...🍆 Never mind faffing round shredding sprouts and frying them with bacon and chestnuts to make them more palatable... If you don't like them don't buy and cook the fecking things!! If your family only eats frozen peas then that's good enough!

5. Roast potatoes... Yes I par boil mine then roast them in goose fat but Aunt Bessie also does the same 😉.

6. Trimmings /Christmas pudding and the like.... Aldi or Lidl!
(Oh and while we're on the subject of pudding - if Bird's Custard is what your family likes on the wretched thing then that's fine - you do not need brandy butter /rum sauce etc or anything else that costs a fecking fortune and takes 2 hours to make!)

7. Family....
Children.. Feed the little blighters first separately, if they only want turkey with tomato sauce - fine leave em to it, it doesn't matter. Once they are fed bugger them off to play with their Christmas presents so that YOU can enjoy your dinner in Peace!

Adults... Anyone that can manage to get their sorry arse to your dinner table is also capable of helping to serve up/ sort the kids out/ clear the table /wash up /dry up etc.

And Finally.....
NO ONE.... And I mean no one APART FROM THE COOK IS ALLOWED TO GET PISSED AND FALL ASLEEP BEFORE THE WASHING UP IS DONE!!!
Rant over 😂
🎄Merry Christmas!🎄

Cheers 🍷🍷🍷 Getting you all in the mood.

B3 · December 2023

My mantra is something similar. My brother gave me these words of wisdom many years ago
"IT'S ONLY A F*****G ROAST DINNER!"
The only thing I'd disagree with above is add lots of breadcrumbs thyme white pepper and onion fried in butter and olive oil to a little paxo and rehydrate with a chicken stock cube in a little bit of water. It only takes a few minutes more than plain paxo. Make it last week and freeze it.

rowlandscastle444 · December 2023

Basically I eat what I'm given, provided that there is nothing spicy about it, and is NOT vegan.
Pudding can be Christmas pudding, Christmas pudding, chocolate pudding and most sweet things.
I will happily wash up, too.

Fire · December 2023

It will be interesting to see if and when the energy usage spikes tomorrow will the nations ovens whirring into action from the break of day.

https://grid.iamkate.com/

Joyce Goldenlily · December 2023

For those of us who love Christmas but are getting, or who have already got in my case, too old to do all of the meal alone, pace yourself. I have been happily making and freezing all sorts of extras to go with the dinner which my daughter and son-in-law are cooking, during the last week or two. It all went in the freezer and was collected yesterday. We even have late invitation visitors joining us for lunch, a couple who would have been on their own, members of my daughter's dive club. I have no idea who they are but are welcome to share our table. We have a habit of inviting a waif or stray or two to share our Christmas meal rather than they be alone.
I think the stress comes from wanting to do our best to provide something special for our families, not a bad thing.
When I was younger I used to begin Christmas food prepping as soon as the kids went back to school in Sept. so that on the day there was only finishing off left to do. Now I am not allowed to lift a finger on the day, it is my family's turn to look after me, which is lovely.
A Very Happy Christmas to all, enjoy.

Lyn · December 2023

I have spread it out. Cake and pudding made in advance but apart from parsnips I don’t like any veg frozen, it didn’t take long to do veg fresh this morning. My daughter didn’t get here until 12.30, cycled to Mevagissey, but it gave me plenty of time to cook.
Won’t break the grid here, we’re off grid.

Christmas To Do List - Brian Bilston

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