Thanks everyone. This is the first time I have been back on the forum for a couple of days.
@wild_violet - no, this isn't the case. In fact, she recently described it as a light shining from my window, when I don't have security lights in any of my windows. I have got on well with *all* of my neighbours except her, and always make an effort to see the other persons point of view, and live peaceably and amicably with and besides them. I really don't believe it is something which is as simple as that. In fact, another woman from the property just called at my front door the day before yesterday, shouting abuse at me, calling me a "mong", and telling me to not go to the bottom of my garden because I am "making her friend uncomfortable". She shouted at me to "not look at her window", said that she was "frightened of me because I was a man"- she didn't seem very frightened - and shouted through to my partner, who is laid up with a broken leg" "sort your husband out, he's dirty".
[And before you ask, no, I haven't been gawping through her window or lurking at the bottom of my garden! I have better things to do in my garden. She, however, leaves her curtains open and lights on into the early hours (something I have never raised with her or the charity) making her complaints about lights and being looked at downright bizarre. I wish I could simply draw curtains rather than having to consider trees and privacy hedges!]
I really don't think this a matter which is being caused by unreasonableness on my part. I realise you aren't saying that is the case, and what you said was a reasonable suggestion, and no apology needed! But if it could be solved by moving a light I would have done that long ago. It really is the people there seem worryingly unstable, aggressive and unreasonable.
The charity are still doing nothing. In fact, they are obviously trying to wash their hands of the problem.
Well, one leylandii might well solve the problem. And certainly wouldn't be covered by a high hedges act.
@Lizzie27 - I appreciate that, certainly - but someone who knows her, a family member, or someone who works for the charity might well recognise it, and I would prefer not to take the chance. She and other people there seem worryingly unstable, to the point where I would worry about the safety of my cat and my partner if they were to find out, not to mention the safety of my property. The chances of it may be slim, but the consequences were such that I am glad the photo has been taken down, especially after somebody from the property turned up on my doorstep to abuse me.
@Songbird-2 Appropriate for my climate or not, Hoheria Sexstylosa is certainly very beautiful!
@kili - ooooh.... Hmmm... I had the impression growing in pots severely limited the height? I shall certainly look into this, though. Thanks.
@jennyj - yes, certainly something to think about. Thanks.
@bédé - Oh yes. That is a constructive way to go. But I would also like to keep at least most of my garden usable without being abused.
If it's starting to escalate it might be an idea to have a quiet word with the police. It registers with them that there is a problem but they don't have to take any action. It will then be on the record in case there's a problem in future and they will give you an incident number. Remember too that AFAIK in England you must declare neighbour disputes with future buyers should you ever decide to sell. Something to think about.
@plant pauper Yes. As it happens, my next door neighbour but one is a policeman. A while ago, they had problems with people from the property going into his garden. Unfortunately getting in touch with the police isn't a magic solution. Trespass isn't a crime, threats themselves aren't a crime etc. And yes, disputes have to be reported. I think this is what the charity are relying on. People won't complain because of exactly what you are saying. People don't want to report such things. He suggested getting in touch with the charity as they would have rules for people living there. I did this - and it was *very* difficult to find out the charity concerned. But the charity seems to have changed very recently, and they no longer seem to care about such things.
I've slightly missed the security light thing. Are they the ones which are movement activated? The twat who lives across the back from me has one at his porch entrance, and although it faces the road and not directly towards my house, it's blindingly bright, and as we're slightly elevated, it's pretty oppressive when it's dark, especially when people are coming and going. Perhaps it's worth looking at the angle of it/them, and seeing how bright they are. It's not always obvious how big an effect they have. The neighbour I have certainly wouldn't care about it's effect though - you should see what the parking involves, which is another problem altogether...
Have you seen this week's edition of Beechgrove? That would put you off bamboo for life, and it isn't a running one they're dealing with. Just be aware that even in a container, it isn't that simple. They can easily burst them, so it would have to be a considerable size and strength.
It's a place where beautiful isn't enough of a word....
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
@plant pauper Yes. As it happens, my next door neighbour but one is a policeman. A while ago, they had problems with people from the property going into his garden. Unfortunately getting in touch with the police isn't a magic solution. Trespass isn't a crime, threats themselves aren't a crime etc. And yes, disputes have to be reported. I think this is what the charity are relying on. People won't complain because of exactly what you are saying. People don't want to report such things. He suggested getting in touch with the charity as they would have rules for people living there. I did this - and it was *very* difficult to find out the charity concerned. But the charity seems to have changed very recently, and they no longer seem to care about such things.
I am coming in rather late on your discussion here but the situation seems to be getting to you quite badly now. Not really surprising. Would it be possible to erect staggered fencing with trellis along the tops, down the length of your garden, creating now fashionable "rooms". Possibly two panels on one side with a third on the opposite side of the garden to create the stagger. Leaving a wide strip of land your side of the bottom wall for garden storage and a winding path from the house to the bottom of your garden.. Shed, wheelbarrow, compost heap etc. where you would not spend much time. If you plant evergreen climbers on the dividing fence panels they will grow much more quickly than trees and would be much easier to keep under control because you could reach both sides. The trees and shrubs you already have are going to create a wilderness of wild trees which will not be easy to manage. Goats Willow is a nightmare, it sows seeds everywhere, especially containers. I am surrounded by acres of the wretched stuff and am always trying to pull up the very long rooted seedlings. Laurel will grow into huge trees left to its own devices and the roots of a full grown willow tree can spread and cause damage to property foundations due to drying out the soil. I am sure if you put "creating garden rooms" into your search there will be lots of ideas and pictures, even creating " rooms" without using fencing, but that would not give so much height. Good luck.
@wams It's not about lights. I have always been considerate of such things. She simply seems to be looking for confrontation. As I've said, another woman from the property just called at my front door the day before yesterday, shouting abuse at me, calling me a "mong", and telling me to not go to the bottom of my garden because I am "making her friend uncomfortable". She shouted at me to "not look at her window", said that she was "frightened of me because I was a man"- she didn't seem very frightened - and shouted through to my partner, who is laid up with a broken leg" "sort your husband out, he's dirty".
The woman in question leaves her curtains open and lights on until the early morning hours (not to mention security lights on constantly itself.), something I have never raised with her or the charity (the lights annoy my neighbour more than me. The noise (shouting and loud music) from the property annoys me more, but again, I have not raised this with anybody.) As I said, if it could be solved by lights it would have been solved by now.
It is strange, but the result of strange, aggressive, unstable individuals.
@Fairygirl - as above. And yes, I'm generally against bamboo, after talking to my partner.
Thank you, @ Joyce Goldenlily Yes, it is getting to me rather badly, I have to admit. I feel attacked and unsafe in my own home, but in such a way that the police would be of no help, and the charity regard *me* as a nuisance and such insults ("dirty"?) and even childish insults ("mong") hurled by adults, whatever their intellectual level, are- well, depressing. The threats from such people create real worry about the well-being of my pet and my property - but again, in such a way that the police could do nothing. Combined with looking after my partner who has just broken her leg, I am feeling rather drained and depressed.
Trellis topped by climbers sounds interesting. My partner was so looking forward to having a garden we could look down towards a Rowan she had planted at the bottom, but we have to do what we must. Certainly something to consider. My next-door neighbour suggested a trellis at the bottom of the garden herself.
Posts
@wild_violet - no, this isn't the case. In fact, she recently described it as a light shining from my window, when I don't have security lights in any of my windows. I have got on well with *all* of my neighbours except her, and always make an effort to see the other persons point of view, and live peaceably and amicably with and besides them. I really don't believe it is something which is as simple as that. In fact, another woman from the property just called at my front door the day before yesterday, shouting abuse at me, calling me a "mong", and telling me to not go to the bottom of my garden because I am "making her friend uncomfortable". She shouted at me to "not look at her window", said that she was "frightened of me because I was a man"- she didn't seem very frightened - and shouted through to my partner, who is laid up with a broken leg" "sort your husband out, he's dirty".
[And before you ask, no, I haven't been gawping through her window or lurking at the bottom of my garden! I have better things to do in my garden. She, however, leaves her curtains open and lights on into the early hours (something I have never raised with her or the charity) making her complaints about lights and being looked at downright bizarre. I wish I could simply draw curtains rather than having to consider trees and privacy hedges!]
I really don't think this a matter which is being caused by unreasonableness on my part. I realise you aren't saying that is the case, and what you said was a reasonable suggestion, and no apology needed! But if it could be solved by moving a light I would have done that long ago. It really is the people there seem worryingly unstable, aggressive and unreasonable.
The charity are still doing nothing. In fact, they are obviously trying to wash their hands of the problem.
Well, one leylandii might well solve the problem. And certainly wouldn't be covered by a high hedges act.
@Lizzie27 - I appreciate that, certainly - but someone who knows her, a family member, or someone who works for the charity might well recognise it, and I would prefer not to take the chance. She and other people there seem worryingly unstable, to the point where I would worry about the safety of my cat and my partner if they were to find out, not to mention the safety of my property. The chances of it may be slim, but the consequences were such that I am glad the photo has been taken down, especially after somebody from the property turned up on my doorstep to abuse me.
@Songbird-2 Appropriate for my climate or not, Hoheria Sexstylosa is certainly very beautiful!
@kili - ooooh.... Hmmm... I had the impression growing in pots severely limited the height? I shall certainly look into this, though. Thanks.
@jennyj - yes, certainly something to think about. Thanks.
@bédé - Oh yes. That is a constructive way to go. But I would also like to keep at least most of my garden usable without being abused.
Thank you all for the suggestions and comments.
Something to think about.
The neighbour I have certainly wouldn't care about it's effect though - you should see what the parking involves, which is another problem altogether...
Have you seen this week's edition of Beechgrove? That would put you off bamboo for life, and it isn't a running one they're dealing with. Just be aware that even in a container, it isn't that simple. They can easily burst them, so it would have to be a considerable size and strength.
I live in west central Scotland - not where that photo is...
The woman in question leaves her curtains open and lights on until the early morning hours (not to mention security lights on constantly itself.), something I have never raised with her or the charity (the lights annoy my neighbour more than me. The noise (shouting and loud music) from the property annoys me more, but again, I have not raised this with anybody.) As I said, if it could be solved by lights it would have been solved by now.
It is strange, but the result of strange, aggressive, unstable individuals.
@Fairygirl - as above. And yes, I'm generally against bamboo, after talking to my partner.
Yes, it is getting to me rather badly, I have to admit. I feel attacked and unsafe in my own home, but in such a way that the police would be of no help, and the charity regard *me* as a nuisance and such insults ("dirty"?) and even childish insults ("mong") hurled by adults, whatever their intellectual level, are- well, depressing. The threats from such people create real worry about the well-being of my pet and my property - but again, in such a way that the police could do nothing. Combined with looking after my partner who has just broken her leg, I am feeling rather drained and depressed.
Trellis topped by climbers sounds interesting. My partner was so looking forward to having a garden we could look down towards a Rowan she had planted at the bottom, but we have to do what we must. Certainly something to consider. My next-door neighbour suggested a trellis at the bottom of the garden herself.
Thank you for the good wishes.