@heraldic.artist Did you use by chance the seeds that came free with the GW magazine last year, the Cherry tomatoes? Your description sounds like what happens with my tomatoes. Even there is the same name of the package, it's definitely a different type of plants. My first tomatoes from the same Mr F... and same name never looked like that. Also, the tomatoes take much longer to develop this time. It wasn't overwhelmingly warm in the South West, but not that cold either.
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I ♥ my garden.
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.