My partner of 13 years died March 1st.......I'm pottering in the garden but my heart just isn't in it. Trying to keep busy, potting on stuff, but nothing seems to be doing well, maybe tears stunt plant growth........have ordering Spring bulbs, looking forward to lots of flowers.......
Hello Mary I am truly sorry for your loss. it's still really fresh and the crisis probably hasn't helped. I didn't want to be alive when I lost my wife. It took a long time to get back out and garden. Yet when I did I found it to be the best therapy of all. Give it time and ideas will develop. it's not going to end your grief it didn't end mine, but as a distraction it will help to cope with it a little.
I'll share something I heard from a counsellor, someone might find it helpful. He said you shouldn't expect to start recovering from a bereavement in under a year. He sometimes saw clients who would say "I should be starting to get over it by now", a few months after losing a loved one. But the first year is full of anniversaries: the loved one's birthday, and yours, Christmas and New Year, maybe a wedding anniversary, all of which you've been used to sharing, and you wonder how to mark these occasions without them. Summer looms, and you wonder if there's any point in going on holiday. Lastly, comes the first anniversary of their death, and you can look back and think, well, I got through it. It will never again be the first birthday etc without them. You can begin to build new family traditions.
Posts