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Please help me plan my share of the garden
I live in a Victorian conversion of three flats and each of us has a share of the garden. Mine is the middle one (the work in progress with bags) pictured below. We initially started out just digging up the old weedy uneven turf and just planned to replace that, but have now decided to reduce the lawn area to increase the borders and try to make it pretty with some small trees, shrubs, flower beds etc. The garden is NW facing and gets a good amount of sunlight throughout the day, and has clay soil. What sort of plants/trees should I be looking at -- I want something pretty that will have visual interest through the year and will attract bees and birds? I'm a complete gardening novice apart from managing houseplants. 


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Have you thought about having some water ... a pool or bog garden ... that'll attract lots of wildlife.
Gardening in Central Norfolk on improved gritty moraine over chalk ... free-draining.
Like Dove said, have a think of what you will enjoy most.. then report back to us, and we can help you plan the details.
The main use for us would be to sit (in some Adirondack chairs :-)) and enjoy listening to the birds and read a book over the weekends (apart from the joy in maintaining/tending to it).
I have a toddler so I was thinking about putting in a small swing but I wonder if that may overwhelm the space. We live quite close to multiple parks, so I don't mind foregoing that.
I think I would probably pick one small tree to make a focal point.
I'd make a narrow path of some sort - maybe grass or gravel to match the main path - preferably curving, from towards the right of your remaining grass to meet the main path near the back of your plot.
One or at most two large shrubs near the fence on the right to give some height and winter 'presence'.
A mixture of perennials to flower from April/May through to November.
A winter flowering climber growing along the fence.
And lots of spring flowering bulbs - which you can plant in the autumn.
I'd put a mixture of evergreens and small herbaceous plants in that narrow strip on the left.
[ETA: just saw you said you like cottage style] If you'd like a Potager, an apple tree (if there are others in nearby gardens to cross pollinate) or a bay in a pot. Herbs like sage, sweet cicely, hyssop and possibly rosemary if it's sunny. Pretty edibles like chard, strawberries, and borlotti beans on a teepee. A shrub might be sweet myrtle or a damask rose.
You need to look around at gardens nearby and get some ideas based on what you like. Pick one or two key plants, make a clear form and then just get stuff you like and grow it.
The key to wildlife friendly is not to be too tidy and to try to have something in flower every day of the year. Go for simple flower shapes - daisies and open bells.
“It's still magic even if you know how it's done.”
All depends what you want from it, the 'flower area' could just as easily be a veg patch I reckon.
It's nice you have a decent wee spot with mature trees and bushes surrounding you I reckon. The broad brush strokes are already there, all you have to do is add a little finesse to set it off.
I'd use the same or very similar wood that your neighbour has used if you do opt for a seating area, it'll blend in better and make your area appear bigger than it is.
Grow some peas mixed amoung your flowers, for your little one. Most peas have white flowers and are green, but some of purple flowers and purple pods! They are magical to children.